maybe it's time for miracles

2011-01-05T22:40:00.002+08:00

Something's changed. About me. I can't exactly say, but to put it in it's simplest form, I realized I have removed the factor 'friends' from my life equation. Was it under the influence? Or have I just myself to blame for today?
I couldn't imagine what my life would be without them since the start of JC life. I actually widened my so-called 'social circle' and changed myself to be more out-spoken. In return for the bonds of those I called 'friends'. I was happy then, in fact, I felt like I never experienced such warmth before. I love that you had people whom you could talk to when you were helpless or confused, people who cared when you didn't showed up at school, people to lend you a shoulder to cry on literally and give you that bear hug when you really needed one. I love those days really.
But I can't fathom as to what changed that and took those times away. Was it the distance? Or perhaps I felt that I could never fit in like everyone else, just because I was not in a Uni now? Looking at how all my friends are enjoying themselves in Uni made me envious, for one, but most importantly, made me remember that I could not fit in anymore. I was in a different world.
Many a times I wanted to really sit down and cry. My life would have been so different if I hadn't gotten that particular set of results. If everything went according to plan, I would be in NUS, studying what i wanted, making more friends and definitely keeping in touch with those close friends. That's how I imagined my life would have been. Fantastic really. Sadly, it wasn't meant to be.
I guess taking 'friends' out of the equation was one of the most selfish thing I have ever done. But putting it back altogether would now be the most difficult task at hand. One which I'm sure cannot be fixed back perfectly anymore.
So God help me.

THE SALTWATER ROOM - OWL CITY

2010-02-02T23:06:00.002+08:00

THE SALTWATER ROOM - OWL CITY

I opened my eyes last night and saw you in the low light
Walking down by the bay, on the shore,
Staring up at the stars that aren't there anymore
I was feeling the night grow old and you were looking so cold

So Like an introvert, I drew my over shirt
Around my arms and began to shiver violently
Before you happened to look and see the tunnels all around me
Running into the dark underground

All the subways around create a great sound
To my motion fatigue: farewell
With your ear to a seashell
You can hear the waves in underwater caves
As if you actually were inside a saltwater room

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When you and I are alone, I've never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
only time, only time

Can you believe that the crew has gone and they wouldn't let me sign on?
All my islands have sunk in the deep, so I can hardly relax or even oversleep
When i feel warm with your hand in mine
When we walk along the shoreline
I guess we'll never know why sparrows love the snow
We'll turn off all of the lights and set this ballroom aglow

So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When you and I are alone, I've never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
Only time, only time

When we're apart whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When we're apart whatever are you thinking of?
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
Only time, only time

Confessions of a very extremely super broke girl

2010-01-31T20:48:00.003+08:00

urgh blocked nose =(
lazing arnd at home
it's rly nice to be able to do anything you want on a weekend=)

this wk was a pretty ...
well i wld say eventful and rollercoaster-like wk
bad stuff first up then

yep had many quarrels wif him
over many things
first was over smth i said tt hurt him
next came the independent speech from me
followed by the 'jealous factor'
sigh
i guess the most impactful of all wld be the last one
but o well
we still managed to clear up the all in the end
mentally taxing
but yeah still survived thru in the end
ultimately unbreakable i hope=)

happy things now!
apart from the clearing up of our quarrels
met up wif the royal highnesses hahahah
jon's enlisting into NS this coming thurs
we can't send him off though
so our meeting was our last meeting wif him b4 he goes in!
kinda sad though
nxt time wan meet up wld be harder le bah
will miss him haha
he dyed his hair!
and shorts! o.0
hahahahaha
went to miss clarity @ thomson
not a rly nice place n the food's sad =(
kb n i shared a bottle of beer
forgot the name haha
tkb tag me on the name of the beer leh lol
i quite like the taste of the beer though
not tt i'm a beer lover
but the taste's rly mild haha
so it's nice to me
jy agrees too
but kb n jon disagrees
o well they always support each other anyway... =p
chatter and loads of laughs abt kb
ROFL. international marriage ceremonies hahahahhaha
miss them big time
i was pretty upset wif him at tt time
but wif the 3 of them
i always switch mood to being happy=)
kb, jy, jon = <3

will be meeting up wif gina nxt sunday lunch=)
will ask her to bring ivan along while i bring yh
but yeah she met yh b4 le haha
official meeting wif her bf!
can't wait!

o ya bought a blue dress from hypnosis and a pair of slip-ons from charles and keith
OMG AT THIS RATE I'M GONNA BE BROKE!!!
already bought 6 diff pieces of clothing - -
still wanna buy
- tights
- white n black tube top
- white shoes! URGENT
- coin purse (the wallet bro bought for me dun hv pouch for coins!!!)
- bag (psst i saw a white carlo rino bag @ bhg lovesssss... but $95 omfg) maybe can aim for a charles n keith bag?
- undergarments (will settle by this wk - - BROKE)

huge sigh
how am i gg to hv enough $ for vday n bday presents?!
die.
stupid pay will only come earliest on the 8th
bloody hell
lucky i no nd contribute to cpf hehehehe
can't wait for pay!!!
i may hv to eat into my this month's savings =(
i promise i'll save more nxt month!!!
o god pls bless me wif better finance management...

tata!

Signing off,
the very extremely super broke girl
P.S. Anyone care to donate to the 'Dawn's Needy Foundation'? Cash and cheque accepted. Lunch and dinner treats are also accepted. Thank you for your generosity=)

2010-01-20T09:52:00.002+08:00

omfg
boss is being a total bitch today
he wants me to sit in a lecture tmr jus to see if there's anything worth as an article wtf
nvm tt the content of the lecture is totally irrelevant
the stupid lecture goes on for a whole fucking day
wth wth
total waste of my time
can hv one more article on the patients or volunteers he dun wan
purposely wan to throw this kinda shit to me
and my executive is like totally taking things so easy so relaxed
got interns tt supposed to report to the venue for work attachment at 930
he came at 10 and still make them wait another 15mins
seriously wad is wrong wif the ppl here la.
working in such a shitty department rly makes me mad sometimes
yet i can't rly say much since 'the walls have ears'
much thanks to my blog since it allows me to bitch wadeva i wan lol
no restrictions, no worries.

finally updating - -

2010-01-18T15:39:00.004+08:00

v long nvr update blog le
sigh
supposed to be at work actually but o well...

work's boring
during dec still got student volunteers here to rly chat up the entire day
still remain in contact with them
amazingly i thought my social circle would expand because of my collegues
in the end it turns out that i'm rly closer to the volunteers and of course Kim=)
first half of the day was absolutely crazy
not that it was my fault
but huge relief that everything's settled down more or less... for now
left abt 6 wks before my contract ends here
will start looking for another job during feb
still contemplating if i shld only start work aft my birthday
working life rly sucks
the only gd thing abt it is the obvious: $
even so
pay sucks totally.
but yeah there are ppl much worse off
and who wld ever be lucky enough to work under a super flexible manager and an ultra-slack collegue?!
told mum i'll never play office politics
but like it or not
you'll be in it once you step into the company
it's so extreme until 'the walls have ears, hush'
sigh
i guess this is THE WORKING LIFE

it's been pretty rocky wif him
realized that long-term relationships are rly hard to maintain
i can now say for sure: HONEYMOON PERIOD'S OVER.
getting upset at each other seems to be the norm now for us
it would be rare if we can last a day without getting upset at each other
that's how bad it is now.
we proclaimed at the start that we'll last till marriage
but woah it's rly not that simple
there's... rly too many differences and clashes of interest
our thinking and mentality towards various issues are completely different
perhaps even like avatar vs human - -
we can't see eye to eye for 99.9% of the time
sometimes i feel that being friends is a far more wise decision...
and there's the problem of having a guy who's currently serving NS
never mind that we spend less time with each other
when he books out he's usually so tired
the mood...
plus now that i'm working
voila - even less time
because of all these, i realize
being independent is of utmost importance
he's never physically there when i'm sick or when i'm facing a crisis
and no, smses via hp does not help all the time.
sometimes when i expect something that normally guys would do and he does not fulfil it
i get really disappointed and think to myself
why can't he learn?
but yeah the bottom line is
BE INDEPENDENT
that's when you lessen the disappointment by a whole damn lot.
i guess i'm rly slow at learning that - -

3 of my student volunteers are coming on wed to visit me whoopee!
meeting up with the queen, the king and the prince lol
(so what am i? the royal pet toad? - -)
the prince is gg NS sooooon
so must meet up more haha
miss them loads
hopefully hopefully meeting up wif gina darling on sat for lunch=)
hvt catch up wif her for a long long time man
miss her too=)

gtg do a little work before knocking off in an hr's time
tata!

btw bro's joining NCC!!! Whee so happy for him=)
AND I GOT MY FIRST DEBIT CARD HURRAH!!!
restaurent promotions here i come=)

2009-11-14T18:10:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY TO TKB N DARL! =)

geog, gp, math are done.

left with chem paper 2 (nxt tues),

bio paper 3 n chem paper 1 (23 Nov)

bio paper 1 (3 Dec)

the hurricane wk is over

sigh

mixed feelings though

am rly relieved tt its over

but then...

am also scared to look at the result slip nxt yr haha.

am scared i gonna get grades tt will get me nowhere.

am afraid of the uncertainty.

sigh.

am rly addicted to FB applications

Restaurant City, Cafe World, Farmville, Fishville n Rollercoaster Kingdom

damn

wish i hadnt started it lol

now keep having to chk constantly to keep things running smoothly

if only running these stuff was tt easy haha.

i wan go swimming!!!

and exercise till i drop dead from exhaustion haha

and start to learn how to play the guitar hehe

as well as learn drums if possible

omg im rly fat now =(

sigh.

omg so many ppl i wan meet up wif

so many things i wanna do

can't wait.

2009-09-22T20:55:00.002+08:00

prelims are finally finally over

though i started slackin since last fri - -

haha

watched 'the ugly truth' wif kb last fri aft our bio paper ended

HILARIOUS TO THE CORE

we kept LOL-ing throughout the entire show

rather crude, as someone puts it,

but definitely an enjoyable one=)

went over to yh's hse on sat for bbq

met his cousins

how interesting!

it was like i cld rly 'click' wif them

though san being pri4 but i got along rly well wif her=)

o and her sis is rly like me LOL

laughing much and being in a cca which we dun look like haha!

btw yeah she's J2 too haha more in common!

gained 2 new frens now=)

sunday was our delayed 1.5 anniversary

of which much unhappiness surrounded it before sunday

but sunday turned out great=)

he surprised me wif a BLUE ROSE!!!

e first n last time he bought flowers was v day

so it was rly a pleasent surprise haha

not cos of e flower

but the fact tt he got a flower=)

could'nt find the white dress i wanted

so bought a v sweet white blouse instead 'beams

and that was his present to me

went to hv lunch at katong laksa

then head back to raffles city springfield

whr i bought for him the black collared shirt=)

looked abit small at first but man

i think he looks much gd-looking in black

(yeah yeah besides the fact that i do love looking at guys who wear decent looking black collared shirts, short/long sleeves. Makes them more dressed up and guy-ish, don't you think?)

went swensen's for dinner

then PS for 'the ugly truth' which, yes, i'm watchin again

cos i rly love how tt show makes me laugh n tt happy ending!

rly happy tt day=) and it marked an end to our unhappiness before=)

then fast forward to today!

math p2 was BEYOND BLEAK.

i guess this'll be the last time i'm failing math bah.

sighs.

went to AMK Lib for books then had budget lunch wif kb n jon

then we went to j8

passed by the mooncake exhibition hehe

saw loads of interesting flavours

wad wif blackforest (urgh tt was way too sweet =( )

champagne flavour (no sample for tt ='( )

and yeah many other weird flavours

then we shopped at nature republic

whr we each bought a bottle of nail polish

i bought omg light blue!? first of my kind

i'm usually into bronze or dark purple or mother-of-pearl

my first blue!

which i happily painted on my toe nails at home a few hrs ago=)

then watched 'gamer' wif kb

yeah its m18 no doubts abt tt - -

but e plot was pretty cool though

haha

cos i'm into such computer-game-turn-reality kinda stories

eg Givenchy Code - thumb's up for tt man!

haha

and the actor's the same as 'the ugly truth'!

o yeah Gerard Butler =)

am now engrossed in reading my lib books

until my hell comes back

and for 2mrw

besides gg over to his hse for swimming

i have at least 4 stacks of articles sitting on my mind

waiting for me to complete my index-ing.

urgh.

can't they even give us a break - -

random: LOVE MY NEW BLUE NAILS=))

tata!

2009-09-05T17:12:00.002+08:00

finished gp prelim exam on thurs

damn

Recent advances in Science has reshaped our world. Consider the implications of this trend?

urgh.

horrible.

today marks the start of my real thorough revision

shall i highlight what i aim to complete within 9 days?

(starting from today, NOW.)

Bio: Read thru all topics notes n practice qns in at least 2 prelim papers.

Chem: Same. And complete tuition practice paper hmwk.

Math: Finish at least 2 practice papers.

Geog: Read thru all notes n look thru qns. And omfg jus realize tt i didn't plan for any geog consultation during sep hols.

oh, FML. how is that even possible within 9 f-ing days - -

unless i dun slp or eat

urgh.

/wrists.

my life now can be summarized in 1 word.

bleak.

sigh.

1.5 anni nxt wk.

but too stressed to feel tt excited abt it anymore lol.

shall go back to bio.

sigh.

2009-09-02T20:23:00.005+08:00

You Belong With Me - Taylor Swift

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset
She's going off about something that you said
'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You, you belong with me, you belong with me

Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you?
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time, how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

You belong with me
Have you ever thought just maybe
You belong with me?
You belong with me

Straight Through My Heart - Backstreet Boys

In the heart
Of the night
Where its dark
In the lights
I heard the loudest noise
A gunshot on the floor

I looked down
And my shirt's turning red
I’m spinning around
Felt her lips on my neck
And her voice in my ear
Like I missed you
want you tonight

Straight through my heart
A single bullet got me
I can’t stop the bleeding
Straight through my heart
She aimed and she shot me
I just can’t believe it
No I cant resist
And I can't be hit
I just cant escape this love
Straight through my heart
Soldier down(my heart)
Soldier down(my heart)

Thought I moved
More than on
Thought I could
Fool her charm
I really wanna go
But I cant leave her alone

Hear the sound
Of a love so loud
I just can’t, I just can’t
Ignore this feeling
Said she misses me
And she wants me
Wants me tonight

In the heart
Of the night
When its dark
In the lights
I heard the loudest noise
A gunshot on the floor

love these 2 songs!!!

man taylor swift is drop dead gorgeous!

sigh...

gp prelim 2mrw

die

why the hell am i still here?!

'runs off to continue reading aritcles

2009-08-18T20:53:00.003+08:00

it has always been the case

that i must experiance the fear of losing smth

before i learn to treasure it

but as time pass

i slowly forget that fear

and take things for granted again

keep assuming that things must and will always go my way

according to what i want

what i imagine it to be

but reality as always

slaps me back from dreamland

to the present time

the present situation

it is, but a cycle

a seemingly never ending cycle

seriously, when will i ever learn?

i realized

there are different relationships in this world

not one relationship is perfect

it's just a matter of whether the problems

exist in a very obvious state or not

i have a confession here

as most ppl wld have known

we started off pretty sudden, pretty shocking

but... feelings not v strong honestly speaking

i'm quite certain its the same for him

judging from how he treated me at e start

but as time goes by

it was like the see saw tipping to one side.

it was not balanced.

they say

thr's always one party hu gives in more

and the other who receive more

regrettably, i belong to the latter.

i'm a little confused

not sure if maturity level can serve as

a reasonable explanation here

on the other hand, i'm not v matured myself

unconsciously,

small problems like this arise

with that, disagreements

and of course coupled wif

those buckets of tear water and heart ache

our cold war has never last past a day before though

and, while most ppl wld see as perfect and blissful

i ask myself - is this normal for a r/s?

often, i look arnd and the answer is no.

many tell me, dun compare

but i compare, because i wan to find the answers

to my questions

i wan to clarify all the doubts that i have

nevertheless, i have yet to find all the answers i need to know.

o yeah

nearly forgot

darl managed to book out from camp last sat nite

a pleasent surprise=)

he was supposed to stay in over the wkend

but yeah lucky him haha

met at nite, and sunday

went lib wif him kb n the sick goat to study

then went wif his family for dinner

they ordered crab! 'drools

but it wasn't tt fresh

enjoyed the time wif him though=)

his POP is in 3 days! =)

k gtg study for geog litho essay test 2mrw

which i hv a strong feeling i'm gonna fail again - -

tata!

2009-08-08T20:32:00.000+08:00

'heels are like chocolate, except without the kg's.'

i know i'm supposed to be doing work now
so i'll make it short and sweet bah

am so glad this wk is over
this super hellish wk
so many things happened!
so many tests
and definitely
so many realizations and disappointments

had 4 tests on wed 2 for geog 2 for math - -
siao la the teachers
couldnt they like sort out such tt
everything is spaced out throughout the wk?!
urgh
but yeah basically screwed every test bah
sigh.
next wk got test every single damn day
crazy crazy
suddenly i can't wait for aft A's.

had a gd talk wif my close frens
haha
v v long nvr sat down n rly ask how's stuff wif
dear pig (or rather aunty amanda)
and of course
goat, his excellency n kb
v long nvr talk to pig le
even though we see each other in sch like 5 days/wk
we seldom talk due to erm geographical barriers?
hard to explain but ppl hu know the situation
yeah u know it.
hmm but i feel tt though we seldom talk
we're still close no matter wad
poured out loads to each other
2 hrs plus of talking is rly insufficient
hope we can continue our talk someday=)

ytd aft ndp celebration e 4 of us finally got tgt
went to orchard n ate fisherios
beer battered fish is yum!!!
then we walked all e way to borders jus to kill time
then rushed back to cine to catch G.I. Joe
or wad some baka puts it as
'G Joe - The Rise of Teh Bing' hahahahaha
aft e show we went to serangoon astons to eat dinner
then crossed over to chomp chomp for beancurd
nice beancurd!!! love e pearls=)
i guess there's this special type of happiness
that i always feel when i'm wif them 3
this unique warm happiness
that i nvr felt wif anyone except wif them
no, not even wif yh
tt's how special it is
i can't even rly put it in words to accurately describe it
but no doubt
it's always felt when i'm wif them
perhaps it's cos of all e stuff we've been thru tgt
all those times

one of my realizations is, however, and most unfortunately
is tt i rly suck as a fren.
i know, they're impt to me, close to my heart
but my actions always speak otherwise
my life, i admit, has changed wif him arnd
so did my actions
but rly
ultimately
i can nvr choose btwn both of you
i suppose i am selfish enough
to want 'the best of both worlds'
but it seems to cause displeasure on both sides.
nevertheless
i rly am trying my best to strike a balance btwn both
pls, give me time so i can learn from my mistakes.
n to my dear frens
thank you, for still considering me as a fren despite of
all the flaws i have
thank you=)

darl booked out on thurs nite n came over
to my hse for supper
though i was feeling a little unwell
mum prepared herbal chicken for him
lucky him=p
but yeah 2hrs is nvr enuf
always find it so hard to let him go
but in e end i know i have to.
darl's booking out tonight though
arnd 10 or 11 plus at nite
tomorrow can meet le=)
but he wun be coming out nxt wk though
in other words when he book in on mon nite
e nxt time we meet will be 10 days later
almost reminds me of BMT
jus when i thought tt period was over
seems like it nvr will be.
i rly nd to start learning,
learning how to let go
learning how to be strong
most importantly
learning how to balance
btwn frens n him
btwn him n studies.
hope i can pull thru tt 10 days
cos in uni, thr's overseas exchng prog which last more than jus a mere 10 days
can stretch over 6 months
so 10 days is rly rly the min.

jiayou to everyone,
and god help me.

'when we grip sand in our palms tighter, it flows out through our fingers faster'
so i guess i rly shld learn how to let go?

FOCUS!

2009-07-26T18:04:00.000+08:00

k am finally updating le haha
since it's been dead for so damn long

been pretty busy
tryin to catch up in hmwk n revision
hvt officially started rev
except maybe for bio p3?
which our bio teacher kept getting us to practice
i rly find doing papers more useful
so we can know wad we need to read up on more n clear our misconceptions=)
hvt cleared all tutorials
gonna finish up at least half of chem grp2 tut and start on geog hmwk n gp
urgh
one pile accumulated again - -
it doesn't ever seem to stop, does it?
but i suppose barring myself frm gg out was a gd thing
at least i completed bio NJ paper3 ytd
happy=) tt i'm finally doing some work on a sat - -

kb's sick =(
not sure if she got frm me
but she's got cough n stuff
so we didn't swim on fri
instead we went out wif sophia, airu n maureen
DAMN FUNNY LA THEIR CLIQUE!
all e gossips n jokes rly kept me laughing all e way hahahha
haha we went to MOF on fri to eat ice cream dessert
SUPER SUPER NICE!!!
for the first time in dunno-how-many-yrs
i finally tried ice cream tt wasn't choc flavour LOL
their hokkaido red bean paste is paradise man!
so is their soft serve vanilla ice cream
i'm definitely gg bk for more nxt wk=p
maybe i'll try psycho-ing kb n pig theyall nxt wk aft lessons
on fri go eat thr again=p

i'm feeling fat n lazy urgh
pretty sure tt i've gained weight
considering all the ice cream tt i ate on fri
aft MOF in e aftnn me n darl went haagen daz
so u can imagine...
it was 2 scoops of choc ice cream plus brownie
*but i didnt touch the brownie hor
sigh
i rly think i've got worms in my stomach
rly been eating alot this past wk - -
sigh

so as seen above
i met darl for supper on fri nite aft he booked out
yep haagen dazs
wanted choc fondue but aft we saw e price ..........
it was a f-ing 42 bucks
wth la
i remember last time e menu said serve for 2 n it was 28 only
WL
now it looks like it serves four - -
was telling darl ask his bro n v along double date LOL
but rly the price is ...
darl came down on sat late morning
haha
then both of us n my family met outside for lunch
b4 he pei me go for tuition
now, thr's rly a great chg here
he used to complain abt public transport fares being ex n stuff
but now he's willing to take e bus to n fro
can see tt army rly causes maturation of guys rofl
but yeah nevertheless am happy tt he chg for e btr =)
he followed me home n stayed for a while b4 zhao-ing off
to join his family n relatives for dinner
was supposed to go wif him but since i barred myself...
the least discipline i had to hv was to stay at home during the wkend
so there.
he came down again today now earlier arnd 10 plus in e morning =)
did abit of electrochem tut b4 leaving for lunch
ate at j8 subway
THE NEW CHEESE STEAK IS YUM!
then we bought seaweed shaker fries n beancurd home
urgh ate so much
not to mention aft tuition ytd we oso bought
korean jumbo sausage n tako pachi
seriously am fat now =(
came home n he went thru my math papers wif me
sigh
seems like i cld hv passed
its all careless mistakes
i know e approach de...
but mistakes here n thr made me felt less confident of my ans
hmm maybe tt's why mr lee still has confidence in me? i hope?
no matter wad
now tt i know whr my mistake is
i'll try my best not to make e same mistake again
well, tt's e least i can do for now i suppose.

sigh.
prelims coming soon
i... rly don't know if i can pull thru
n get the grades tt i wan
the days left to nov9
rly starts to make me wonder
is it rly possible? can i do it?
can i follow my dream n get a place in NUS, in the course i wan?
i guess my ans wld always be the same.
i can, i need, i must.
hope this wld be my strongest motivation for the last lap of abt 4 months.

focus is my key to success now.

2009-07-13T17:01:00.002+08:00

got back all my papers le

but didnt take gp n bio cos was sick

still had to sit for bio structured qns as a timed prac

totally died on tt man

gp's coming up soon this wk

sigh.

failed everything so far

feeling kinda...

i dun rly know how to describe

sad definitely cos thru-out my entire jc life

i keep failing n failing

but kinda expected though

considering the fact tt i didnt put in much effort esp math

which earned me tt pathetic result

i nd to stop shunning math jus bcos its my weakest n start practicing =(

only 8 wks to prelims

4 months to A lvls

seriously how the heck am i gg to survive during this last lap?!

rly feel hopeless at times

but somehow

i always manage to squeeze out a smile and say

'everything's gonna be okay'

maybe i shld stop decieving myself

obviously everything's not gonna be okay from the looks of things now

unless i'm gonna give my full for the remaining time

wish i had tt kind of motivation for O's

tt kind of thinking tt nth mattered more to me than getting the grades tt i wanted

been also thinking

i shld also start to cut down e time tt i go out

as well as slack

increase the time for completing hmwk n most importantly

studying

but

rly hard for me to

since most of e time when i go out

it's always wif yh

n now tt his 6 wk stay in course started

it also means i only get to meet him on wkends

which is already painful enuf for me

kor told me

'you alrdy survived tekong, now sure can la'

but rly,

jus bcos i survived one lvl of hell doesnt mean i can for e subsequent lvls

sigh.

also worried for kb

looking at her today...

i guess now's a rly bad time tt we hv to pull thru tgt

jiayou bah!

i want to find back my motivation

i must find back my motivation

i need that motivation

desperately.

god help me.

2009-05-17T18:58:00.003+08:00

darl didnt managed to come out
cos he got caught by his officer
brought his hp to field camp
so he cldnt come out for e wkend

when i first heard
i felt extremely shocked n disappointed
shocked cos he didnt tell me he was bringing his hp
otherwise i swear i wld hv stopped him
disappointed cos
tt sat was all i ever kept looking forward to
the anticipation
all my hopes
was dashed on tt very day

cried alot
but kor called n consoled me
so im much btr now
darl n me went thru quite a difficult time
i think tt sat was e most heart-wrenching period
for both of us
everything was like on e verge of breaking point
i was sick of being disappointed n hvin to cry so much over him
he was afraid tt i'll choose to leave him
but we got everything sorted in e end=)
thank god for tt.
we both realize we needed each other ultimately

shall look forward to nxt sat then
i nd to jy for this wk
bio spa n chem test
gambatte!

'any moment, everything can change' - Hilary Duff

2009-05-16T11:56:00.002+08:00

today's e day!!!
finally finally finally =)
dunno wad time's darling gonna be out though
haha
but anyway got chem tuition
so can only meet him aft my tuition

haiz
my cough's rly bad
this morning wake up sexy voice ROFL
i wan my voice back!
urgh
maybe cos these few days
keep consuming cold drinks
LOL
but frankly
when i hv bad coughs
i dun care
zhao yang take de
tkb u oso not supposed to take cold drinks!
LOL
must refrain man
otherwise i'll be left wif sign language
to communicate wif ppl=p

wl so much work over e wkend
siao one
haiz
plus nxt mon bio SPA
final one le!
n chem common test on fri =(
jiayou jiayou!
aft nxt wk then can take a breather=)

lookin forward to seeing darling later!
tata!

2009-05-14T20:01:00.005+08:00

"Someone's Watching Over Me"
Found myself today
Oh I found myself and ran away
Something pulled me back
The voice of reason I forgot I had
All I know is you're not here to say
What you always used to say
But it's written in the sky tonight

So I won't give up
No I won't break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong
Even if it all goes wrong
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe
Someone's watching over me

Seen that ray of light
And it's shining on my destiny
Shining all the time
And I wont be afraid
To follow everywhere it's taking me
All I know is yesterday is gone
And right now I belong
To this moment to my dreams

It doesn't matter what people say
And it doesn't matter how long it takes
Believe in yourself and you'll fly high
And it only matters how true you are
Be true to yourself and follow your heart
-I know you're watching over me=)

4th day is over!
yeah 2 more days only!!!
damn happy
today mr h not here=(
but mr b took over
haha he damn funny too but oso stress ppl out sia
timed prac was bad
i dun think i can fare well for this time haiz
o ya pig terence kb n me got take funny vid
we remaked the advertisements on tv la
ROFL
hilarious
laugh until beng lmao
got the M1 adv, the gambling one n magnum - -'''
rly damn super funny omg hahahha
we shld go sign up wif mediacorp liao hahhaha
aft pe went subway wif pig n kb
haha nice!!! and cheap =p
bought bubble tea too=)

got yearbook today too
saw darling's photos
got 2,
one in math superteam
one in class
haiz
miss e times when u were still in AJ
miss e times u waited for me (vice versa)
miss e times we looked forward to breaks
miss e times we hang out during breaks
miss e way u look in sch uni
miss your hair!!!
wahahahha
last time keep saying darl's hair ugly
but now haha no comments la hor? =p
appreciate e past now
though i know its impossible to return to it

haiz
still no motivation to do work
and i hv a list of to-do's:
-approx tut
-respiration tut
-geog essay outline
-carboxylic tut
-nitrogen cmpd tut
*study bio SPA!
*study for chem test on fri!
a whole mountain of work
and i dun feel like starting at all
man
darling hurry come bk
i nd my motivation pls
god help me. rly.

2 more days!!!

2009-05-13T20:25:00.002+08:00

its end of 3rd day
i'm dying
LOL
wonder how's he doing
hmmm
but i guess lucky me at least got frens arnd me bah
though they dun rly talk much abt him
maybe dun wan me get too distracted missing him bah
haiz

our class clique...
haiz
rly dunno wad to do now
i'm practically forced to take sides
frankly
it seems kinda childish
u know the i-dun-friend-you thing?
wahlao
we're like how old le
seriously
in JC still got this kinda stuff rly hilarious
haiz
but reality...
totally sucks la
rly sick of this liao
sum1 pls advise=(

miss darling=(
got so many things wanna tell u
not sure if can remember until sat though
life completely and entirely without you
makes 6 days feel like 6 lifetimes
everytime i think of you
the pain sets in
the tears start to flow unknowingly
the sadness gushes out with no prior warning
i hate the emptiness
i hate the loneliness
i hate life without you
its like i can't do anything right when you aren't arnd
can you hurry come back please?
haha
since when did you turn me into such a dependent person?
i rly don't know

wan watch angels and demons!!!
hv been waiting to watch for damn long le!
hope maybe can watch with darling nxt wk bah
i guess when he come bk on sat he'll jus collapse on e bed
from exhaustion
maybe when i go see him on sat he'll be sleeping 99.9% of e time
hahaha
your video and msgs is not making me feel btr
it makes me miss you even more=(
miss you alot alot alot.......

3 days more...

2009-05-11T19:47:00.002+08:00

its 1st day of field camp
woke up at 8 (set alarm)
went bk to slp until 11
then slack slack slack all e way until like 2
just can't seem to get myself to focus
but i did finish bio evolution tut
gonna start on 3 newspaper articles soon
i promise

i'm not myself today
forced myself to not think of him
when i was slacking
i forced myself to shut him out of my mind
watched youtube vids dl music
anything
except him
but somehow
when i look arnd
everything i see reminds me of him
our pullout bed
the chair
the dining table
the kitchen
the cup he always used
the shirt n shorts i lent to him last sat
which are now hanging dry on e clothes line
everything brings back all the memories

you told me to be strong b4 u left
i rly am trying...
but its hard
so difficult
cos practically everything tt i see
reminds me of you
when i close my eyes
i see nothing but you
but its a gd thing though
at least you're there with me at night
when i sleep
when i close my eyes
you're in front of me
and so i look forward to every night
you're my motivation=)

29 days to POP!
darl says thr's gonna be grad nite for them
and he says he's bringing me along=))
o yeah smth to look forward to haha
new dress!!! =p

kk back to work
will keep myself occupied in e day
my night is reserved for you darl
gd nite and rest well darl=)

5 days more! GAMBATTE!

2009-05-06T19:36:00.002+08:00

its been abt 4 wks
but this 4 wks seemed as if
half my life has passed by
i learnt n changed so much during
this short span of time
selection pressure: NS

yeah it seems pretty ridiculous
i mean
i'm not even serving NS
haiz
regrettably though yh is
or maybe not.

well, one thing i can say is
our relationship sure became stronger
i remember vividly
the first 2 wks of confinement
those phone calls tt lasted avg 15 mins
tt was rly a huge jump from the 2hr phone calls
we used to hv b4 he went in
it was rly hard for me at tt time
trust me
you hv no idea how much i cried during
the first 4 nights
because at tt time i realize
at night
he wasn't physically thr anymore
no more complaining over e phone
no more mindless gossip
when i pick up e phone
i go straight to e pt of what i want to
say to him
no stammerings
no hesitations
and definitely
no crying
cos i figured out crying over e phone
is just a wastage of our precious time
every single minute
perhapes even second counts

yeah i do cry lesser nowadays
partly cos of the fact i forced myself
to adapt to this new life
life without him during the wkdays
the tears has somewhat dried up already
but thr are of course some breaking pts
afterall i'm still human
i do feel lonely
i can't be 24/7 strong
thr were certain factors tt accumulated
and pushed me to my breaking pt last mon
it was terrible
i cried
and i made him cry n worry
which ultimately made me even more sad
but we talked thru
we both felt
tt our relationship is strong enuf to
overcome these factors
and so problem solved=)

he's gg on field trip nxt wk
which means
5D4N no phone contact at all=(
i dunno how the hell am i gg to survive nxt wk
loading myself wif work n chionging finish my tutorials
seems like a pretty gd solution
hopefully tt 5 days will quickly pass by painlessly
pray tt the tears n breaking pts will not come during tt period
pray tt i will be strong enough
pray tt i will survive.

kb jus reminded me ytd
cos now my wkends are totally spent on him
i dun even do my work on the wkends
which i used to
which means
i gotta start making full use of my wkdays to chiong
my work
since i'm spending my wkends wif him already
haiz
mus stop taking long naps le
now the schedule is so tight!
i'm starting to feel tightness n suffocation
but i'm still not taking much action - -
hope i dun nd mid-yrs as a wake-up call man

to darling
jiayou for your field camp
when it's over you only hv abt half the
journey of ur BMT to complete!

to myself
gambatte!
you'll hv more than just 9 wks in battle
i'll be needing more of perseverance
less of weakness n vulnerability
god help me.

2009-04-10T23:32:00.002+08:00

all the little things that you do for me
seemed so insignficant when you were still around
sending me home almost every nite
bringing tissue when we're out
holding out your water bottle to me
reminding me if there's a step
taking my bag for me when i'm feeling lazy
helping me blow-dry my hair
guiding me in my work
holding out a tissue whenever i needed it
wiping my tears away with your fingers
faking sleep when you demanded my attention
bringing baby to my house
wearing whichever outfit i wanted you to wear
having to tolerate my mood swings
all these small little things
added up and ultimately
i realize their importance only when you're about to go
only when it's too late

your snoring
your umbrella
your home dressing
your hair
your tummy
your singing
all the little things that you do makes you beautifully imperfect
i miss you.

2009-03-18T22:45:00.003+08:00

jus met up wif tkb, jon n darl at manhatten fish market

jy u've been missed

anyway

shared seafood platter wif kb

nice!!!

service thr was great too=)

it was pretty hilarious today

cos they were trying to give me a surprise but somehow...

hahhaha damn funny la!

always spoilt by me LOL

anyway

got a flower balloon, home-baked dark choc cake and crumpler bag from them
i know its super super ex

sry guys...

but yeah i love it alright=)

including tt bitter dark choc frosting cake=p

had a wonderful time wif u guys 2nite

laughing n crying hahahah

rly appreciate alot

sry tkb made u waste ur entire day today away

but i rly appreciate wad u done for me

making a surprise

not for my bday alone

but also surprising me wif the thought tt yall truly cared for me

arigatou kb, jon, goat n darl=)

home-baked dark choc cake by kb n darl=))

bday cake box top=)

flower balloon n black crumpler=)

2009-03-17T21:20:00.002+08:00

today's post is dedicated to the following ppl
thank you so much to you guys
for loving n caring for me so much
and celebrating my bday for me=)

the most thoughful girl - peilin =)
thnx so much for the pouch n magnet!
i know ur bday's coming up! =p

candice nu er=)
thnx so much for tt swensen's treat!
hvt ate thr for a long time
i truly enjoyed our catching up n the black pepper seafood pasta=p

(in no order of preference) ruiyin hot babe, princess jer, aunty zhilin, mooncake fellow bday girl, v xin fu lirong =)
thnx gals for tt beautiful card, nice bag n of course the face shop nail polish
had a wonderful kim gary dinner wif yall
love u guys!

dearest darl yi herng=)
for celebrating our anniversary wif watchmen n carl's junior
though quite random
but yeah i enjoyed myself, just so you know=p
thnx darl!

to my beloved family
thnk you for pei-ing and celebrating my bday for the past 19 yrs
i truly appreciate all the time spent
hugs and love=)

the class clique!
amanda the pig, yunhan the quiet one, terence laughter, soen meow and tkb
thnk you all so much for giving me a memorable time at astons by surprising me wif the wallet n posh brownies!
hahas had a great time laughing silly wif yall!
hugs=)

for the future (actually its 2mrw)
tkb (yes u again!), darl (you too!) jianyang the goat and jon the AJI singer
though i dunno wad u guys are planning/up to
someone told me its gonna be a surprise tt i'll love
but anyway
wif or without the surprise
thnk you so much for tolerating me these 2 yrs
its been great knowing you guys
hope we can stay like tt forever=)
hugs - applicable to kb only

clar, tian sheng kor, gina, benjamin kor kor, dingjie, jeremy tan, meikee
thnk u for ur bday wishes=)

d day's superb this yr! =))
love u guys!

ugh potato

2009-03-08T22:45:00.001+08:00

sweet potato sucks to wadeva hell

its not sweet
its not a potato
its disgusting
its ugh
its wtf
it shuld be called.......... qweeeh (completely random)

2009-03-08T20:19:00.002+08:00

urgh hving allergy reaction to fur
cos me n darl went into a pet shop on fri (i didnt touch anything!!!)
nxt moment at home my hand had little bumps tt congregrate to form lumps
unbearable at nite =(
sat morning went to e doc
she gave me a jab n some med
funniest thing - e med's drowsy effect was so effective tt i fell aslp in e clinic while waiting for my med to be ready - -'''
dad had a tough time getting me home lol
at e end of sat i took my med n went to bed
which i then woke up on sunday morning
to find e most horrifying scene ever
my legs were covered in rashes =(
but now it was redder n not in lumps
haiz
so went back to e doc in e aftnn
however he said it was all part of allergy reaction
and tt he cldnt do anymore already
so i only needed time
haiz
i rather he gave me another jab man LOL
i wanna get back my norm skin! =(

o yea btw
my paternal aunt is a two-face lying bitch.
have i mentioned tt earlier?
oops.

2009-03-08T20:14:00.001+08:00

my paternal aunt is a two-face lying god-damn bitch.
o yeah.

2009-03-02T21:22:00.001+08:00

madly madly madly
well tell me that you need me (to not be angry wif you anymore)
show me I'm the only (one making you miserable and sad) and thats all i need to know.

madly madly madly
well if you really love me,
when you see me leavin' (getting angry) baby, just let me go ( and get angry at you)

2009-02-28T20:58:00.004+08:00

man i've been hardworking today hehe
shall take e nite off then!

gina darling
it was great meeting u today=)
happy tt u like e gift
dun overwork urself k?
hope to cya soon
take care!

revision 2mrw wif darl
sian
haiz

15 more days to D-DAY!!!=)
is tt supposed to be a gd thing or bad thing?
i wonder.

madly madly madly
well tell me that you need me
show me I'm the only and that's all i need to know

madly madly madly
well if you really love me,
when you see me leavin'
baby, just let me go

2009-02-22T20:55:00.002+08:00

i wanna watch
he's just not that into you=)
marley and me
race to witch mountain
transformers 2

i want to have
one more bag!
a decent wallet so i'll stop losing my cards- -
queen of babble gets hitched!
one more comb ROFL
a talent for studying(yeah i totally nd)

i want to be
overall, a better person
ME=)

am hoping d day's gonna be fun this yr=p

5 Love Languages

2009-02-22T12:00:00.002+08:00

http://www.greaterquest.com/LoveLanguages.asp

Score
Love Language
4 - Words of Affirmation
4 - Quality Time
7 - Receiving of Gifts
8 - Acts of Service
7 - Physical Touch

- -'''

Your highest score indicates your primary love language. Your second highest score indicates your secondary love language. If two scores are identical, you are bilingual (you have two primary love languages). If the scores of your primary and your secondary language are close (for example, 10 & 9 respectfully), it indicates both are important to you. Whatever a significant other does to express love in either of these languages will get emotional points with you. The highest possible score for any language is 12.

2009-02-21T22:19:00.002+08:00

i'm not sure
of everything
lost
confused
seems like i cant grasp hold of anything afterall

tt old feeling's
kinda long gone
dunno why
maybe it's just me
maybe i'm jus reading too much into everything

i know
people say we have to learn how to be strong
to let things go
but it isn't as simple
as i would have thought months ago

i know
people say get your priorities right
yeah i'm trying
i want to place studies as top priority
but somehow
my actions prove otherwise

i want to break out of this emotional circle
i'm tired
the past - it was sweet and innocent
the present - filled with disappointment half the time
the future - i'm not sure anymore

though i try to imagine life differently
i see nothing
except loneliness
perhaps i've gotten used to life wif you around
perhaps now you have become a part of me
that no matter wad happens
you'll still exist in me

a person of countless, if not, many flaws
it's been a miracle that many people accepted me
despite seeing the ugly side of me
despite knowing that i'm unbeautiful
despite knowing that i'm imperfect
thank you so much for tolerating me
-in the process of trying to mature-

still
i'll try to live everyday with a smile
sometimes it may seem difficult
but i know i'll be able to achieve it
with your help=)

P R O M I S C O M I N G ! ! !

2008-11-29T00:22:00.002+08:00

1 long post coming real soon...
PROM!
will include photos of the hopefully-gorgeous-perfect me on tt big day=)
counting down...
5 days to 3 dec

blogged; updated

2008-10-22T22:49:00.002+08:00

yes yes
im FINALLY updating - -
man super lazy sia soooo long nvr update le hehe
ps...

k 1st n most important news headline
IM PROMOTED
yes i am.
FINALLY too.
ROFL
3h2 1h1 pass
but results not up to expectations esp chem =((
haiz
tt was a huge disappointment
cried alot on results day
thnx to mrs tan, darl, kor, gina darl n all others who encouraged me n make me smile at e end of e day =) hugs

but but but......
im super super worried for nxt yr la
A's leh!
e huge major exam in a yr's (counting down...) time
im so not prepared
im not even a mugger
though most ppl think i am
haiz
plus darl's gg NS sooooon
either dec or nxt yr jan
SAD
but i guess when he's free during e wkend shall bug him for tuition hehe
tuition for math n bio =)
nxt yr mrs tan's hving bb season n his excellency's hving SYF
in term 2
busy busy
as for me
i've got no more cca
so i'll be free-er than them
but yeah thr's disadvantages to tt despite hving more time

my job so far is still e on-and-off flyer distribution one
i did submit my resume to a job agency tt my cousin introduced me to
gg for interview this fri
NERVOUS SIA
but my ideal job currently wld be e gift-wrapping one at robinsons
i cld always learn a new skill
esp in gift-wrapping since i always suck at this kinda stuff
LOL
tts y most of my presents to frens are always wrapped by mum =(
yeah no sincerity...
but im determined this time to learn it well =)
besides, mrs tan oso doesn't mind this job
it'll be fun!

prom's coming up!
though its not rly my prom but...
well...
darl's thr
plus all my j2 frens are thr too
will rly miss them when they're gone nxt yr =(
anyways
won't be wearing anything new
not allowed to buy a new dress until nxt yr's prom - -
so ppl hu know me in cedar you'll know wad im gonna wear le
but i'll be getting new jewellery and new bag
and hair styling + make-up
AND im not wearing specs
will be trying out contacts
hehe finally sia!
will get to see darl in long sleeve shirt too =p
psst... i hv a fetish for guys wearing long sleeve shirts - -''' silly me
but tt'll be only in dec so wait till then for e photos! =)

recent addiction:
PERFECT WORLD
but today sucks la
got stuck in a quest
then com v v lag - -
sian
but i recommend this game to ppl hu's not studying for A's haha
trying to ignore the goat and his excellency's suan-ing abt perfect toads and ikan bilis
- -'''''''''''''''''''''

hsm3 anyone? *i know its childish n immature but so am i =p
tata!

half yr anniversary!!!

2008-09-14T21:16:00.002+08:00

o yeah!
ytd me n darl celebrated our half yr anniversary!!!
haha
time sure flies
so fast alrdy 6 months
our relationship's been through e sweet, the bitter, the troubled and the happy times
so many stuff happened within these 6 months
i also got to know darl better
for eg
wad he hates eating
wad he likes eating
wad he usually wears
wad he's deprived of .......
still out of those
e most impt thing i felt i learnt in these 6 months
was how to love him.

anyways
i had a very long and tiring day ytd
had chem tuition for 3 hrs
then had to rush for piano lesson
it was only at around 645pm
that our celebration begun
darl picked me up at my hse
(which was so sweet!)
then we went vivo whr we had our eh
its-kinda-complicated-but-i-think-u-can-call-it
a pre-date bah
LOL
basically whr i went to watch a movie wif him alone during my bdae this yr
which was merely 6 months ago
so vivo rly has a special meaning to us =)
we went to e same restaurent whr we went right after
i came back from the AB camp
THE MUSSEL GUYS
e food's a little pricey but its nice
v filling i must say
so it was fish n chips for me n grilled fish for him
which we shared half half (SWEET!)

we left vivo at arnd 8 plus and head to sentosa siloso beach
was pretty dark by then
but super romantic!
haha
walked down e beach and just sat down at some random spot
despite wearing a white skirt
but well i dun give a damn
im wearing fbt under so...
haha
plus it was so dark la!
hahahaha
so we just sat thr...
gaze up to e night sky
looking at how bright e moon was
counting how many stars thr are
sounds rather cliche
but
when you're with someone u love
e feeling's indescribable
everything's different
everything's perfect.

so tts how my half-yr anniversary was!
to me its unforgettable =)
arigatou darl for giving me such a memorable half-yr anniversary!

NEW LAPTOP =))

2008-08-31T10:34:00.002+08:00

O YEAH
NEW LAPTOP!!!
'screams
LOL
thnks to dad's customer tt i hv a brand new laptop
hehehehehe
chuckles...
its screen is smaller than my previous one
but this one HAS SOUND
LOL
im so deprived of sound la
previous laptop had no sound de
bloody hell
n must always do CPR to make sure it starts up
this one is so much btr la!
hahahahaha
its also much lighter partly cos of its size la
but yeah
super super happy!
hahaha
family's gg to e RSAF open hse
but cos they might be gone e whole day
and mum dun wan me to waste time
so im here in e lib...
yeah i know im supposed to be studying
but i wan slack a little
hehehe

I WAN WATCH MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!!!!
OMG LA
tt show's trailer looks damn nice
its another dance movie
its producers was from 'step up' and 'step up 2'
omgomgomg
i wan watch!!!
its cuming on 4th sept
eeeeeeee
so near promos la
haiz

o ya
teacher's day was totally sucky
i wun say who e teacher was
but
WTFH
HE WAS SO F-ED UP
like seriously
official school gift dun wan accept
can summore say wat leave it for myself
WTFH
my name is ___________ meh?!
WTHWTHWTH
PLUS
he rejected alot of homemade stuff like debbie's homemade strawberry jam and aw su's card
they so thoughtful to go to such extent
YET
he dun wan accept
plus
we bought for him a toy flower he oso dun wan
when we say wan put in his pigeon hole he say he will throw away
F HIM LA
he wan throw away throw la
he wun be throwin away mere gifts
he will also be throwin away e respect tt we had for him
seriously
he doesnt earn my respect at all
though i know im supposed to like set a gd example n stuff
servant leadership as they call it
BUT
if my classmates are being treated tt way
no way
he's rly gone too way overboard le
nvm e fact tt he always had a thing for retaining
and tt he had to pick on us
but rejecting our hopes of recognising him as a teacher is rly...
haiz
i totally felt not motivated in math alrdy
since he lost all hopes on me
but kb n mum both say all e more i shld show him tt
i hv e potential and tt i can
yeah
i agree
but easier said than done
i know tt i nd to put in alot of effort
haiz
we'll see as it goes bah

darl's sick =(
im not sure if its cos of me
since i was sick e entire wk - -
haiz
get well soon darl!!!

kk
must start doing work le
my primary purpose was not to come lib n slack
LOL
tata!

counting down... 22nd sept =(

teacher's day pressie!

2008-08-28T22:13:00.002+08:00

bought teacher's day gifts for gp, math, bio, chem and geog teachers

as a class of course =)

kawaii rite!

hehehehe

so cute tt i dun feel like giving to e teachers lar....

i wan cute stuff toooooo!!!!! =p

btw i started playing table tennis le

yes cos 'inspired' by li jiawei

LOL

typical s'porean...

hehe darl say tt i not bad lor

hehehehehe

first time play alrdy know how to smack

n was it spin? aiya smth liddat

anyway v pro jiu dui le =p

wahahahaha

look out: e upcoming li jiawei

ROFL

'who the hell am i kidding man - -

i think today too high le LOL

yeah may be playing bb 2mrw...

gg jon's hse for 1st time!

hahahaha

cool man

cant wait to see terence's constipated face 2mrw ROFL

tata! =)

Rescue me

From everything

I just wanna live

I wish i could breathe

- Rescue Me from Hawthorne Heights

David Archuleta - Crush

2008-08-22T21:00:00.002+08:00

David Archuleta - Crush

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside..
It was a rush, what a rush
Cause the possibility that you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know..

Do you ever think when your all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath when I look at you
Are you holding back, like the way I do
Cuz I try and try to walk away,
But I know this crush ain't going away, going away

Has it ever cross your mind
When we're hangin spending time girl
Are we just friends
Is there more, is there more
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last,
Last forever, forever

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know..

its a holiday. =(

2008-08-11T19:54:00.001+08:00

tired... but happy =)

i miss you... even when you're here with me.

tired... MY BABY PHOTOS ARE SO CUTE!!! =)

2008-08-10T22:45:00.002+08:00

yawns
super tired
went lib to study geog
ended up hvin running nose
super fustrated sia...
didnt do much work in e end
then went to watch the mummy wif darl, kb n jon
its quite nice leh!
haha

random...
cos darl wanted to see my mohawk baby pics
so here they are!

KAWAII RITE???

hahahahhaa

everytime i see these pics i would wonder was this rly me...

LOL

too cute to be true

as in cute in the past

now...

not cute le =(

LOL

hahahaha

kk wan go slp le

2mrw bishan lib AGAIN

its like my 2nd home le...

sians

geog test

math class test

gp essay

chem spa

GG SIAO.

give me a break pls?

DREAM BIG - EMILY SHACKLETON

2008-08-07T20:00:00.003+08:00

DREAM BIG - EMILY SHACKLETON
When I was a little girl
I swore that I would change the world
When I grew up
Nothing else would be enough

Back then it all seemed black and white
But these days I just can't seem to find
The child in me, who always believed

I see it everyday
We settle for safe
And lose ourselves along the way

But if you don't dream big what's the use in dreaming
If you don't have faith there's nothing worth believing
It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for
So reach out for something more

Took a well perfected plan
For me to finally understand
That it's not me
Faith is something I can see
I loose the reins and let em go
I broke the chains I fear
That had their hold on me too long
When all I felt was wrong

I've wiped my tears away
Now it's time for a change
No I can't waste another day

Cuz if you don't dream big what's the use in dreaming
If you don't have faith there's nothing worth believing
It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for

Yeah
So close your eyes and tell me what you see
Between what's real and make believe
Here's the path we've all been searching for
So reach out for something more

Than you ever could imagine then move
Don't wait for it to happen
Life's too short for not taking chances
The stars aren't as far as they seem

But if you don't dream big what's the use in dreaming
If you don't have faith there's nothing worth believing
It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for

So close your eyes and tell me what you see
Between what's real and make believe
Here's the path we've all been searching for
So reach out for something more
For something more
So reach out for something more

crazy abt this song =)

2008-08-01T21:18:00.002+08:00

This is me - Demi Lovato & Joe Jonas

I've always been the kind of girl
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say
But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know
To let you know

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me

Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way

You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
I need to find you, I gotta find you
You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me
I need to find you, I gotta find you

thoughtful quote by foreign film 'No Man's Land'
'Neutrality does not exist in the face of murder. Doing nothing to stop it is in fact choosing.'

its not your fault, so don't feel guilty.

the cure to all my sadness

2008-07-28T00:26:00.001+08:00

cos you and i are one.

SWEET.

2008-07-27T21:49:00.001+08:00

from jer's blog

awww....

sry i hv a fondness for such sweet stuff =)

the same boring life that i always have

2008-07-27T20:40:00.003+08:00

k...
i know i hvt been blogging much
haha
ps cos nowadays
-no interest in blogging
-no time (fully dedicated to darl, frens n studies)
haiz
this whole wk has been real hectic
so much work la
siao man...
everyday slp at 1 or 2 plus
again i ask myself the same qn
is it worth it?
is doing hmwk more impt than getting a gd rest?
i guess as singaporean students we hvt got much of a choice
as reflected in the recent straits times
i think its e sunday times last wk
the special report featured on pri sch students not getting enough slp
the reason?
HOMEWORK
seriously
i think perhapes we do need to look further into our education system
as jy has pointed out in his ppt
we singaporean students has been learning through sheer 'memorizing'
and not 'understanding'
which of course explains why singaporeans cant think creatively and
more innovatively as compared to foreigners from countries like finland
where their children attend sch for about 4 hours
but yet overall they seem to be able to handle situations better
as compared to our local students
we need to move away from our rigid education system and change the way
students perceive education as.

k i think im rly gg crazy over gp
cos recently just did an essay
is the education system in your country effective in producing good citizens?
i spent alot of effort on it and desperately hope can get a decent grade for tt
hahahaha

anyway back to my life
went lib today
stupid jon pangseh
baka
he woke up late and decided to go ahead wif his 'chore'
in other words DOTA
wth la
darl went for e garden festival wif his family
miss him loads
haha
mum v nice
she brought home made lunch for me n kb n jy
hahaha
fried rice n spinach n fried chicken wing
plus water chestnut drink
yumm
haha
was v productive today
partly cos darl not around =p
no source of distraction
hahahaha
came across this funny conv
younger sis was holding a pencil and a sharpener
younger sis : can help me sharpen ?
elder sis : sharpen yourself la
younger sis: i cant sharpen myself, im sharp enough *pokes
HAHAHAHAHA
DAMN FUNNY
me n kb keep bie-ing our laughter la
but i think e 2 sisters know la
hahahaha

o ya
mum told me smth v disgusting she saw
she was in e train when she saw this young couple
they were sitting down and e guy had his hand around the girl's shoulder
suddenly e guy started
get this right
tickling HER TITS
wth la!
n e girl simply say (in chi... they were chi speakin)
'stop it la... you very naughty leh! hehehehe...'
OMFG LA
SO DISGUSTING
GROSS TO E MAX
hullo
don't they have any shame??
its called public transport leh
not secret rendezvous!
dad say shld hv taken photo and send to STOMP
hahahaha
eewwww......
young couples these days are rly gg too far
esp in the area of PDA
otherwise known as
Public Display of Affections
'shakes head
but i think tt disgusting action above cant even be classified as PDA
seriously
i thought tt wld come under outrage of modesty
but since tt girl likes to give the impression tt she's all for such sexually
disgusting acts
i have nth to say
except tt she's a total disgrace to the women population.

k got to go continue chionging work le
shall try my best to continue blogging for alap
haha
tata! =)

i've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter...

NEW BAG!!!

2008-06-06T20:49:00.001+08:00

WOOTS!
DAMN HAPPY SIA!!!
hahas...
bought a new bag 2day
MY 1ST ZINC BAG!!!
zinc was hvin 25% off all bags
plus i had limited bags
(didnt hv 1 tt can match for formal wear)
so... yepz
its white though
so i muz rly rly take care of it sia
e white looked nicer than e black one
so its my 1st time pickin white over black
this one can be either shoulder or sling
yeah!!!
hahahahaha
super happy!
here's 2 pics of my new bag!

o ya
kb came over 2 my hse 2day
DAMN FREAKIN FUNNY
i shall help wif e publicising of her blog
LOL
ppl hu go to her blog
do take a gd look at her tagboard
smth juicy gg on thr sia
HAHA!
anyway
i shld hv video e way she hyperventilated
after lookin at her own tagboard
haiz
wasted sia
o... not to mention e high pitched screams
'OMFG NG JIANYANG!!!'
hahahahaha
had a gd laugh 2day

darl went 2 watch narnia wif his family
plus he went to e henderson waves
u know e long bridge thing?
eee....
PANGSEI
LOL
but well
tts not e most impt thing la
rly miss darl
haiz
wonder y...

last thing:
TKB HONEY DUN HYPERVENTILATE ALRDY HOR! LOL...
UR BROWNIE WILL XIN TENG NI DE... HAHAHAHAHA =P
tata!

ABCDE CAMP =)

2008-05-28T22:16:00.003+08:00

OK......
i know i hvnt been blogging much
so nw
this is gonna be a SUPER LONG ONE
prepare urself!

1stly,
as most of u hv known
i went for e ABCDE thing (class leader)
its basically a 6 day leadership training camp
may i emphasize
6 FREAKING LONG DAYS!!!
OMFG
DAMN LONG LAR!
i missed home, family n of course, darl
common sense wld tell u tt we surrended our valuables to
e instructors on e very 1st day
haiz
but thing is
IM BACK LE
so 'shrugs wadeva...
shall blog abt wat hppnd each day
if i can remember (cos i hv stm as most ppl wld hv known)

DAY1
this was an extremely sad day sia
v v v she bu de darl
so he sorta pei wo until yck stn
then b4 i surrended my hp
i called him juz to say 'see u soon in 6 days time!'
felt lyk cryin lar
but darl says tt can be training for e following 2 yrs
omg
i seriously wonder how im gonna survive at tt time
anyways
thr were
as usual
ppl hu didnt report on time
so our camp chief aka instructor shaam (sum of u may know he's ODAC p)
made us do pumping AT E FREAKIN TRACK
tts exactly how i got e bruises on my knees
sighs
every1 was forced due to e camp theme
'one for all, all for one'
which at e end of e day
felt rather meaningful
then nxt aft we settled in our bunks which was
juz actually classrooms (1133 for me)
we went for values workshop
rly tried my best to stay awake
'yawns
i did take notes down in my notebk
btw juz 2 add my notebk pages was all black
cool rite??
darl said was cool so... haha! =p

DAY 2
this was e start of pure hell
we moved to LAC
OMFG
i been thr lyk 6 times (including this time)
- - totally sian diao
played general games n high e n rock climbing
also had sandcastle building planning n discussion
basically
a rather long tiring day
1 thing to note was tt our instructors malikka, wei lun n charlie liew
facilitated us aft every activity tt we did
askd many qns tt rly got us reflecting
this was wat made e experiance an eye-opening one bah
lastly we had vision workshop part 1
in which e 3 class leaders got tgt to rly think of our class vision

DAY 3
today's e most back-breaking day man!
SANDCASTLE BUILDING!
in case i didnt explain earlier
our grp did on e asthestics area of AJ campus 2038
will post on blog if thr's a pic of our final masterpiece
nearly drove us crazy cos e part we were workin on kept crumbling down
LOL
but still we persevered on n introduced flexibilty
(u can tell tt was part of e reflection thingy)
so our final sandcastle structure was still successful =)
we also played general stns
n had e conflict management workshop as well as
the continuation of vision workshop
we also discussed on our SL proj tt was given to us during e camp
was rly rly damn funny lar!
our team included yilin n her class leaders
had a great laugh durin discussion time
but anyway here's e gist of our SL proj
we're organizing activities to interact wif the elderly at xin yuan community care
loads of funny ideas was brought up here!!! ROFL
at nite
i had a very bad headache
had problems even walkin straight
totally crazy man
plus e fact tt i had digestive probs during e 1st 2 days
haiz
so cos of tt i was brought to e sick bay
sry instructor malikka, weilun n charlie for worryin abt me!
took med n slept
also muz thank dear madelyn n yilin for being there =)
love u girls!

DAY 4
woke up n felt much better
but still had abit of stomach prob....
since it was raining
we went indoors n played games
aft which was e 1st aid workshop
wish darl was e 1 conducting e workshop
nxt up we had e values workshop part 2
then we discussed e final details of SL proj
and tryin out e games we planned
pretty interesting
poor yilin had constipation
didnt know wat to do to help her
cos i didnt had med for constipation
only had e charcoal pills which helps diarrhea
we also practiced fine-tunin our singing HAHA!

DAY 5
its e SL day 2day! (at e same time counting down
to land ex n last day =p)
went to e community centre n picked up e elderly ppl
had a lot of fun interacting wif them n playin e games
but yar
thr's e lang barrier
i only knew abit of teochew
all of them spoke diff dialects including teochew
had a hard time communicating
thankfully sum of them understood chinese
but thru this SL i learnt alot frm e elderly ppl
seriously alot
was a very enriching experiance =)
aft SL was emotional SOS workshop
then we slept slightly earlier to prepare ourselves for e land ex

DAY 5 at 10 plus
gettin ready for land ex
pretty excited n scared
HAHA
madelyn we can do it!!! jiayou!!!

DAY 6
we trekked frm AJ to bedok jetty
set off arnd 11pm n reached at 5 30am plus
cool
i n mad talked alot of stuff
so tt kept us distracted frm e fatigue n stuff
finally when we reached
e sense of accomplishment was juz too immense
rly wonder hw we managed to make it so far sia
WOOTS!
WE GIRLS RAWK! (me, mad n yilin)
back at AJ
we had grad ceremony
received cert n e ABCDE shirt
also had a great lunch n bid farewell to 'inspector malikka', instructor 48 and 'uncle charlie'
HAHAHAHA
damn funny la the 3 of them
plus e gay couple (brandon n instructor 48)
HAHAHAHA
will miss them loads
of course i'll also miss my sisters
mad n yilin tigger!
u guyz r rly great man...
love u guyz loads!

overall
e camp was a great experiance
plus its cos of all e pumpin tt i hv stronger arm muscles now sia
wahahahaha!
'campers, 50 down'
'pumpin position now!'
'campers where's ur sense of urgency??'
i'll nvr 4get this whole experiance

so there
will try blogging more consistently
'yawns
signing off...
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

CO CONCERT!

2008-05-05T19:51:00.002+08:00

woots!
went for aj co concert on sat wif darl
hahas

met up wif kor n mich for dinner
went kfc at tpy hub
then we made our way to tiong bahru mrt stn
went to e nearest florist to buy sunflowers for jer n mooncake
(yeah i know its totally last min...)
met gina n her fren outside SCH
sat at e 2nd row
omg la
so close
cld see jer damn clearly
tt silly girl
keep smiling to herself when she saw us
wth
sha gua
but ya
rly happy to see her on stage performing
mooncake too!
wasnt as obvious
but later i read her blog
OMTIAN
she say she heard me call her name la!
HAHAHA
my voice too distinct liao
but darl say its gd so she knows im thr for her too
hahaha
overall e concert was v gd
though its my 1st time listening to CO concert
but i felt it was a gd ear-opening
(k i dunno if gt such term ornot.. HAHA) experiance
best thing is
its wif darl =)
yupz

after CO concert
we went bk to bishan for supper
at (isit called the coffee club or smth liddat?)
originally wantd 2 try e cheesecake but damn suai
so darl bought apple crumble instead
i bought juz plain ice tea
(boohoo... was actually quite hungry de but cos i had ulcer so damn pain... )
haha!
so tt marked e end of my wonderful saturday

I WAN GO FOR ANOTHER CONCERT!!!
lol...
damn sad cant go for choir concert
so qiao grandma's bdae on tt day
haiz
otherwise i confirm go de lor!
still
gambatte jon! i'll be supporting u mentally while enjoying
my 10 course dinner =p
HAHAHA

k gtg chiong geog essay le
brb!

COOL MON!!!

2008-04-29T22:10:00.003+08:00

WOOHOO!!!
mon cv was SO BLOODY COOL SIA!
WAHAHAHAHAHA.....
91.3 FM came down to AJC
cool shit
we dedicated songs via the DJ
jickky dedicated my FAV SONG KILLA by cherish n joc!!!
omg la!
hahahahha....
i dedicated beat it fall out boy feat john mayer
to kb, pig, yunhan n soen
he summore recorded my voice n played it LIVE
OMFG
damn cool
i heard my own voice over e radio at arnd 9 plus
totally dun sound lyk me at all la!!!
i sound more lyk a.... quoted frm sum1's sms
'hiphop pop singer'
HAHAHAHA.....
pig sounded so demure la!
LOL
total opposite of hu she rly is (oops! shhh...)
kb said it sounded totally lyk me - -
btw pig dedicated to 1108 stop n stare by one republic

1 more interesting thing is
as u can tell frm e pics below
WE TOOK PHOTO WIF E DJ N PAUL TWOHILL!
pig's idol...
hahaha...
she damn funny! so shy lyk yunhan! LOL
anyways i wasnt rly a big fan of him
but still no harm in takin a photo wif him =p

paul twohill, me n e DJ

paul, pig, soen, yunhan, me n e DJ!

1 last interesting thing was...

we ran napfa 2.4km

omfg it was damn bloody freaking hot

BUT

my timing was 12 58!!!

WOOTS!!!

i originally wantd 13 11 or 13 15 de

in e end

HAHA

btr than wat i expected

NEW PERSONAL RECORD!

wahahahaha....

great sense of achievement sia =p

tnf meet 2mrw

cheerleading HOT HOT HOT

hope to get our 4x400m medal on e podium sia!

hahaha....

lookin 4ward 2 wats cumin aft tnf meet too!!! =p

shh... my lips are sealed

gtg zz le

update soon!

lunch today + lyrics!!!

2008-04-26T22:28:00.004+08:00

woots!
went out wif yh 2day for lunch =)
went to eh was it called e coffee club? at ngee ann city
hahas!
yum yum
at 1st didnt know whr to go eat de
then we walk walk walk
until we saw e coffee club
looked interesting
so we checked it out
COOL
gt food tt looked tempting!!!
wahahaha
so we ate thr lor
YUMMY!
i ordered seafood lasagne
his was smoked salmon wif garlic cream linguini
omg e salmon is so damn nice
my seafood one too!
got squid mussels n prawns
OMFG
i wan eat again la!!!
LOL
running 2.4 on mon
so gonna die man
hahahaha
but well
i dun regret eating! =p

c tests nxt wk
hvt rly started studying
omgomgomg
i cant afford to fail any common tests!!!
haiz
ready to mug 2mrw =(

my seafood lasagne! =)

our iced mocha wif vanilla ice cream (eh i think e ice cream's sorta gone by now =p) n thick choc below (see e dark brown patch at e bottom of e glass? tts it! )

btw now quite crazy over this song n right here by miley

quite lyk e lyrics

haha

alrdy dedicated right here to kb

wateva tt i wantd 2 say

was so clearly expressed in tt song

yupz

love u lots kb!!!

gambatte!

See You Again - Miley Cyrus

I Got My Sights Set On You

And I'm Ready To Aim

I Have A Heart That Will Never Be Tame

I Knew You Were Something Special

When You Spoke My Name

Now I Can't Wait To See You Again

I've Got A Way Of Knowing

When something Is Right

I Feel Like I Must Have Known You In Another Life

'Cause I Felt This Deep Connection

When You Looked In My Eyes

Now I Can't Wait To See You Again

[CHORUS]

The Last Time I Freaked Out

I Just Kept Looking Down

I St-St-Stuttered When You

Asked Me What I'm Thinking About

Felt Like I Couldn't Breathe

You Asked What's Wrong With Me

My Best Friend Leslie said "Oh, She's Just Being Miley"

The Next Time We Hang Out I Will Redeem Myself

My Heart Can't Rest 'Till Then

Whoah, Whoah, I

I Can't Wait To See You Again

I Got This Crazy Feeling Deep Inside

When You Called And Asked To See Me Tomorrow Night

I'm Not A Mind Reader

But I'm Reading The Signs

That You Can't Wait To See Me Again

sianz...

2008-04-24T20:58:00.002+08:00

wah
dunno y nowadays lyk damn lazy to update le
hahas
rather bz
wif work
wif tests
n of course chatting wif him
HAHA

nw that i know thr are MORE ppl readin my blog...
i guess i cant rly put much stuff up here le
HAHA
esp 1108 sophia airu n gang
omtian
their whole gang knows abt me n him lar!?
LOL
dun rly wan this kind of 'popularity' though
hahaha...

sports ppl hving their season these past few wks
jickky's disappearing for soccer
yunhan for tennis
pig for hockey
kb BB
haiz
kenna ps sia...
LOL
but anyway
to all of yall
GAMBATTE!!!
LOVE U GUYZ LOTS!!!
dun wry...
if u 'bu shuang' them
let me know
im MS remember?
WAHAHAHAHA.....
i can easily set a 'bomb' in their sch
LOL
jkjk...
but yar
all the best for ur matches!!!

will be gg for CO concert wif him n gina
haha!
so lookin forward to it!!
jiayou to
jer, mooncake, terence, hamster aka soen!!!

o yar
will be gg to e J2's prom
hope ppl dun ask me
'dawn wat r u doing here??'
esp e teachers
i juz wanna be wif my ex-class
hv fun b4 we all lyk go our separate ways
also most importantly
hv a great prom nite wif HIM
it has always been my wish to be a
NO LAUGHING
1 nite 'cinderella'
i know how stupid this sounds but...
well... im a girl hu's rly into this kinda stuff
nvm me...
im still young at heart even though ive long crossed e '18' barrier
hahahaha...
cant wait for prom!!!
so happy tt kb's gg too!
love u kb!!! =)

kk
gtg do work le
common test wk nxt wk =(
totally not lookin 4ward to the TESTS
haiz...
but gambatte!
for e sake of CO concert!!! =p
update soon!

命中注定我爱你主题曲 =）

2008-04-11T22:23:00.001+08:00

九十九次我愛他 - 元若藍

保加利亞玫瑰的精油
全滴在他剛才牽過我的手
橫衝直撞我的心像一顆躲避球
誰懂愛停在手裡多久

學問道理教科書都有
戀愛上上籤到底哪裡求
如果有教授我一定要努力修
丘比特呀快為我加油

多想帶著雷達到他夢裡
仔細調查
愛的正卡還有沒有副卡
也想拿起掃把在他心底
洗洗刷刷
不專心的念頭哎咿哎咿都清除啦

九十九次我愛他少了眼皮會亂眨
要他能心電感應我的想法
每天念著他的名字哎咿哎咿一句不差
九十九次我愛他少了頭髮會分岔
要他的想念每天準時打卡
愛像冰淇淋在嘴裡溶化

my super LONG post

2008-04-09T21:29:00.002+08:00

loads of stuff happened since my last post
haha...
lets see if i can recall...

last wkend i went out
supposed to be wif yh, kb, jy n jon
in e end?!
jy say 'not enuf time to travel to hotel'...
so all ps me n yh
so we went to far east plaza n bought FRIED MARS BAR!!!
OMG
SO FATTENING!
but extremely yummy, no doubt abt tt!
wahahahaha.....
then we both sian diao..
went to jer's hse
on e way we pop into sum small gallery thing near e mrt stn
cool man.
HAHA
then we took e mrt to jer's hse
frm orchard all e way to woodlands lar!
LOL
seems lyk gt too much time to kill liao.
zl was oso thr
HAHA
wantd to watch island but didnt hv enuf time though
haiz
anyway
her dad's cooking was excellent!
as if it were restaurant food lar!
he oso showed us a chi erm i dunno wat u called it but
i guess u can call it a mini essay?
LOL
cool man....

mon was our heats for 4X400m
SIAN MAN
waited until 7 plus for our heats
totally nuts man
kb n pig had abit of a conflict?
cos we wantd 2 give up looking at pig so tired
but she insisted on not giving up
so glad we ran at e end
WE CAME IN 1ST !!!
OMFTIAN
hahahaha
rly damn happy sia
but aft running my round
i juz collapse at e stands n couldnt get up
my legs was damn pain sia!
thank god for avril
she help rubbed deep heat rub
healed damn fast sia!
deep heat rockz man!
HAHA
n yar, thnx KB for talkin to me =)
i rly appreciate tt alot!

o.. then when i went hm
tts when i fell sick
=(
running nose - used up lyk half e tissue box within a nite
SIAN
felt abit feverish too..
haiz
n e worse thing was
i still had to chiong GP hmwk (4gt to do!)
plus e geog prjt (but thnx to jeremy, he was rly understanding.. arigatou!)
felt rly sick e nxt day so took a day off
but at hm
i rly missed yh, kb, pig, yunhan n 1108 sia...
lols
thnx 4 those hu smsd me ur concerns!
ARIGATOU!!!
love u guyz!

went back to sch 2day
morning was totally horrible
tried my very best to stay awake cos e drowsy effect of e med
hadnt subside fully
thankfully ms sabariah was totally fine n even told me not to
go odac in this state n to rest my head if i felt unwell.
SO NICE LAR!
haiz
feel damn guilty for forgettin to do gp hmwk
sry ms sabariah!!
i promise i wun ever 4get !
n thr was kb n pig
wahahaha
im missed!
hehehe
thnx to them my day didnt turn out to be so bad
in fact we had alot of gd laughs here n thr
WAHAHAHA
o yar
e finals of e fdc
30 07 didnt win
but well... it sure was interesting lookin at yh cross dressing!
ROFL
so cool to hv a new 'gf ' sia!
HAHAHA!

sianz
2mrw nd to go sch even though thr's no lesson?!
wth
waste of my time
im bringing all of my tutorials to sch to do
gt test nxt wk
muz jiayou man!
nt 2 mention tt im gg 2 be damn busy on sat
chem tuition, piano class n last but not least, STEF'S BAND CONCERT
woots!
im gg wif yh mah.. tts y so IMPT!
HAHAHA
can't wait till sat!
tt reminds me..
i btr stop spending so much $ gg 4 movies + ex lunchs + concerts
start learning e art of window shopping!!!
lols

kk.
i guess my post is damn long liao
btr stop here
more updates soon!
ganbatte! =)

yh's profile!!! LOL, ROFL + LOL combined

2008-04-05T00:35:00.003+08:00

CHECK THIS OUT MAN!!!
this is yh's profile thingy.
read it when u feel down.
SURE CAN LOL DE!
*still laughin after 10 mins...
ouch my jaws hurt sia!

Real name: 13 (yea no kidding)
Nicknames: Chiang Yi Herng
Married: no, and never will be... too bad :P
Male/Female: after IHFDC, i cant tell
High School: bss
College: ajc
University: piss off
Short or long hair: short but want long
Are you a healthy freak: who cares about health, when its time to die, u die
Height: neglegible
Weight: neglegible too
Do you have a crush on someone?: currently, no.
Do you like yourself?: sometimes.
Righty or lefty: righty!
First…
Piercing: to hell wif this, i dun go for thaipusam mind u
Person you see in the morning: myself? in the mirror?
Award: does a paper plane comp count?
Sport you joined: i dun do sports
Pet: spider
Vacation: HK, when i was barely 1yrs old (beat THAT)
Concert: kindergarten graduation concert
First crush: crushes are supposed to be secret
Currently…
Eating: curry puff
Drinking: teh
I’m about to: go on to the next qn
Your future…
Want kids: no
Want to get married: heads up, no
Careers in mind: how nice would it be to be able to be a singer/actor/wadeva the hell tt brings u fame
Which is better?
Lips or eyes?: eyes, check out uchihas', hyuugas', allen's, and mine xD
Hugs or kisses: kiss kiss
Shorter or taller: shorter (less energy wastage)
Romantic or spontaneous: dun understand
Sensitive or loud: dun care
Troublemaker or hesitant?: are these even opposites?
Have you ever kissed a stranger: cos not. but does being kissed by a 1st 3 mths OG member on the 1st month count?
Drank bubbles: yea, saliva bubbles
Lost glasses/contacts: yes, after 1 month tt damn specs jumped (what are the paladins doing man...)
Ran away from home: yes, when i'm late for wadeva
Liked someone younger: yes
Liked someone older: yes, i like everyone
Broke someone’s heart: i tink so......
Cried when someone died: no... death is a good thing
DO you believe in…
Yourself: who else?
Miracles: nah, its all planned
Heaven: duh... i came from there
Santa claus: i murdered him 50 yrs ago
Magic: real or fake?
Answer truthfully…
Is there someone you want to be with right now: duh its yes
Do you believe in God: Theo = god

interesting short self-intro crap

2008-04-03T19:46:00.002+08:00

saw on jer's blog...
saw on kb's blog...
guess now's my turn!
*though i found it a little stupid...
but nvm
i'll juz try out anyway!

Real name: Lim Jiaying Dawn / Dawn Lim Jiaying *dunno which sequence lar!
Nicknames: dAwNi3, THE FAMOUS MAS SELAMAT (absolutely ridiculous), bommy (related to MS), donkey, 猴子 etc....
Male/Female: FEMALE DUH. guy's version is DON. pls get this right.
High School: CGSS =)
College: AJC
University: NUS biomedical research area.
Short or long hair: in between? haha
Are you a healthy freak: a little? can tell when i mention abt pratas n ice cream hvin loads of calories...
Height: 156cm (yes pathetic i know...haiz...)
Weight: 46.2 (trying to get back into the 45 range)
Do you have a crush on someone?: hmm.. does my bf count?
Do you like yourself?: depends
Righty or lefty: righty =)

First…
Piercing: 'scratches head... i think its k2?
Person you see in the morning: mum =)
Award: Swimming award (4gt wat it was)
Sport you joined: swimming
Pet: RABBIT!!!
Vacation: malaysia, genting highlands
Concert: erm erm... does choir concert count? dun rly go 4 this kind of thing.. but hope i can go for more concerts, this time wif my bf
First crush: p5

Currently…
Eating: just finished dinner... gummy bears? HAHA
Drinking: nothing
I’m about to: finish this blog post XD

Your future…
Want kids: yup =)
Want to get married: between 24 and 28
Careers in mind: cancer researcher, wedding gown designer (i know how funny this sounds but i did rly thot of tt)

Which is better?
Lips or eyes?: eyes
Hugs or kisses: hugs
Shorter or taller: taller!
Romantic or spontaneous: a little of both.. or maybe abit more to e romantic side?
Sensitive or loud: sensitive pls...
Troublemaker or hesitant?: troublemaker =p

Have you ever...
Kissed a stranger: OMG DUH NO!
Drank bubbles: wth is tt??
Lost glasses/contacts: dropped mine in e sea?!
Ran away from home: i love home. no thanks. plus the money issue.
Liked someone younger: hmmm EC counted?
Liked someone older: yup... was seriously blind =(
Broke someone’s heart: recently yes
Cried when someone died: yes.

DO you believe in…
Yourself: depends
Miracles: 废话... doesn't my blog url say it?
Heaven: YES
Santa claus: not rly... whr's my present frm santa??
Magic: sumtimes
Answer truthfully…
Is there someone you want to be with right now: my bf?
Do you believe in God: yup. im a christian. =)
--END OF PROFILE--

can't wait for sat!!! =)

o yar abit random lar
but i think this song's quite sweet
juz lyk my bf =)
but minus e 1st verse thnk u.

Our Song - Taylor Swift

I was riding shotgun with my hair undone in the front seat of his car
He's got a one-hand feel on the steering wheel
The other on my heart
I look around, turn the radio down
He says baby is something wrong?
I say nothing I was just thinking how we don't have a song
And he says...

[Chorus:]
Our song is the slamming screen door,
Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window
When we're on the phone and you talk real slow
Cause it's late and your mama don't know
Our song is the way you laugh
The first date man, I didn't kiss her, and I should have
And when I got home ... before I said Amen
Asking God if he could play it again

I was walking up the front porch steps after everything that day
Had gone all wrong and been trampled on
And lost and thrown away
Got to the hallway, well on my way to my lovin' bed
I almost didn't notice all the roses
And the note that said...

[Repeat Chorus]

I've heard every album, listened to the radio
Waited for something to come along
That was as good as our song...

Cause our song is the slamming screen door
Sneaking out late, tapping on his window
When we're on the phone and he talks real slow
Cause it's late and his mama don't know
Our song is the way he laughs
The first date man, I didn't kiss him, and I should have
And when I got home, before I said Amen
Asking God if he could play it again

fri - NG JIANYANG!!!

2008-03-29T21:05:00.003+08:00

WAHAHAHAHA....

met jy on fri (as u can see frm e title =p )

woots!

rly miss tt faggot sia

seems lyk we hvt met for a very very long time

but in actual fact it was juz last wk..

or maybe e wk b4..

hahas

but anyway

was rly hpy 2 see him n his gay partner jon tgt!

FINALLY jon gets 2 see n talk 2 jy since his return frm italy

here's a pic i took featuring the 2 GAY PARTNERS

(jy/jon will kill me if they know tt i posted this here.. but well

I DUN CARE! =P )

SO SWEET RITE???

just missed out e part of holding hands

LOL

so after gg round amk hub

we decided on fish n co.

ate fish n chips

YUMMY!!!

but only managed 2 eat lyk half of e fish n sum chips

dog aka jeremy who met us later GLADLY

*may i emphasise e word GLADLY

polished up e plate for me

PIANG LAR

another rubbish bin

he seemed so deprived of food lar!

damn funny

jon ar.. u nvr feed ur dog pedigree isit??

lols....

went back 2 sch 2 wait for yh

went 2 j8 2 watch STEP UP 2!!!

hahas

though i watched on youtube alrdy

e quality wasnt tt gd

most importantly

i didnt watch wif HIM

HAHA

anyway it was gd to watch it again

all e dance steps=W O W

totally cool sia!!!

after dinner (which i felt too full to eat so i juz watchd him eat)

we went HAAGEN DAZS!!!

OMG

it was totally HEAVEN

belgium choc + choc cookies (cant quite remember e name) + strawberry cheesecake

topped with hot choc fudge n caramel sauce

SO SWEET!!!!!!!!!

WAHAHAHAHA....

but yar think abt e calories...

though i did EARN an ice cream for all e hellish pe + pt sessions i went thru

eating tt was gaining at least twice of wat i burnt off

LOL

guess i gotta work out again nxt wk!

after savouring tt super sweet ice cream

super sweet yh walked me home =)

1st time tt a guy wld walk me home!!!

hahas...

rly felt so xin4 fu2 tt day =)

but yar

after all tt

i gtg chiong hmwk

GOT SO MUCH HMWK LAR!

siao...

2mrw still gt qing ming jie

muz wake up early go mt vernon

'sobs

shall go 'chiong hmwk'!

outing wif yh, kb n jy =)

2008-03-22T23:44:00.003+08:00

no comments on my outing wif yh, kb n jy
except tt we had good food (OMG HK restaurent n BEN N JERRYS!)
n we had a gd time chatting (wish jon was there...)
beat that man!
hahas
but v sad
had to leave for piano lesson at 4 plus
sianz...
i originally wantd 2 stay until after dinner then go up 2 e top level of vivo
n watch e stars at nite (sounds so nice rite??)
but well
some other day bah...
o yar
we oso passed by sum wedding exhibition thing in vivo
OMG E GOWNS R SUPER NICE!!!!
nt tt i wanna get married or wat
but one of my past ambition was to be a
get this right.
WEDDING GOWN DESIGNER
dunno y...
but i was rly interested in designing gowns
loved daniel yam's gowns
always vowed tt i wld wear such a gown for prom
though im no princess
i juz wanna hv wat a normal girl alwys want
a cinderella night
as simple as that
but for now
reality is nt giving me such an opportunity yet
till then...
hahas.
anyway enuf of all e crap
here's some pics frm 2day!

sweets tt yh bought for us =p ARIGATOU!
random to e max. LOL

anyway

one more impt thing

i hinted my mum on my bgr thing

she was totally ok wif it

so i juz spilled everything

luckily she n dad was lyk

'we're ok.. juz as long as it doesnt affect ur studies'

so i juz nd 2 jiayou 4 my academic stuff

TIME MANAGEMENT!!!

hving chem tuition 2mrw

sianz...

till then...

=) im living life my way!

impt announcement

2008-03-20T20:39:00.003+08:00

i finally talkd 2 most of my frens
including ry
cos at 1st quite scared she'll be upset or angry at me
hahas
turned out to be a false alarm
we'll still be frenz no matter wat happens de, dearest ry!
hahas

anyway
here's it.
im officially attached!
my very first bf: yh =)
but yar
its lyk sorta useless posting it here
cos ALMOST E WHOLE FREAKIN WORLD KNOWS
omg lar
dunno hw on earth it spread until so scary sia
HAHA
but i hope it can stop spreading
this kinda thing shld also hv a limit bah

kk..
as for hw it started
i can only say one thing
11 59 on my bdae!
HAHA
go figure =p

but anyway
now kb n jy is lyk eeww-ing me
dunno y lar!
HULLO
WE'RE NT EVEN SENDING MUSHY MESSAGES
siao lar the both of them
can't wait to see jon's rxn
i think he'll juz explode?! (quoted frm dear kb)

lots of things hppnd after jon left
this bgr thing n e most saddening thing
JY leaving for poly
in fact he alrdy left
omg
i n kb was damn sad lar
super super super reluctant to let him go
k no.. sounds wrong
but u get wat i mean rite?
e 4 of us ie me, kb, jy n jon
went thru SO MUCH TGT
being retained
being caught for playing cards
ponin
all of it sounds pretty negative
but frankly
tts when u know hu ur true frens are
so our frenship is rly very very strong
undescribable in words alone
an invisible bond linking all 4 of us tgt
but now
though jy left
we will always miss him
no1 2 shower me wif sarcarsm daily
no1 sitting at tt same table always chkin his phone
no1 playing cards wif us in sch (kidding.. we dun dare le!)
omg
i rly miss u jy!!!
haiz
but still
i guess u'll be happier in poly
so tts y me n kb will respect ur decision n
ultimately hope tt u do well in poly
though we'll miss u terribly
'sobs
but yar i really treasure u as a gd fren n hope e best for wateva u do in future
do keep in contact!

will blog again 2mrw.
so looking forward to sat =p
signing off! =)

2008-03-16T14:12:00.002+08:00

I shouldn't love you,
but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you,
but I can't move
I can't look away
And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make the feelings stop
Just so you know
This feeling's takin' control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go
Of you but I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know

It's gettin' hard to
Be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way
And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make the feelings stop

This emptiness is killin' me
I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Lookin' back I realize it was always there, just never spoken

suddenly wonder why these lyrics sounded so familiar
as if it was what i felt in e past
drenched in the pouring rain
it only makes me feel worse now

ITS D DAY!!!

2008-03-16T08:32:00.005+08:00

1stly , big THANK U for those hu remembered my bdae!!!
too many ppl, but i know hu u r
yupz..
ARIGATOU!
love u ppl!!! =)

k..
now e story:
it was FINALLY the day
D DAY.
hahas
made it sound so big when in actual fact
its juz my bdae
LOL
anyway
thnx 2 tt sum1
i had a happy bdae!
haha..
cant say out e name yet
but yar
one thing sad was tt
1ST TIME GT SO MANY PPL PS ME!!!
'underline+highlight+bold'
seriously
since my bdae is always in e hols
i didnt hv any frens 2 celebrate wif me until sec sch
but WL
ytdy was ultimate SAD sia
jer, kb, my, zl, pl all my girl-frens
PS ME OF ALL DAYS
lols
quite unexpected leh
my idea of 18th bdae was supposed 2 be wif a group of my frens
go eat lunch n watch movie tgt
juz lyk any normal outing i had
but haiz
every1 was forced 2 get their priorties right
so yupz
i may seem angry
but deep down
i wld be thinking:
'jiayou jiayou! its ok de...'
hahas
cos i wld hv most prob done e same thing
ultimately, its studies tt is most impt=)

but though i felt sad
i oso felt SUPER HAPPY
ARIGATOU princess jer!
i think u gave me e best bdae present?!
LOL
its nt ok 2 say now
so...
i'll keep in mind first?
HAHA
for me
it was lyk a MIRACLE
though my blog's name is miracles do happen in my world
i rly didn't expect it to rly hppn 2 me!
tt idea was totally absurd
totally impossible
totally hard-to-believe
but after confirming
i felt rly surprised
RLY HAPPY
haiz
4get it
i can nvr describe e feeling accurately in words
but guess u sorta know wat i mean?
hahas
still abit scared when i woke up in e morning tt it was nth but a dream
whr's e 真实感 man??

anyway
here's sum pics of ytdy!

bdae present frm sum1... LOL
cant reveal e name yet!

woah! tts wat MY saw rite? hahahas...

1st time im in vivo cinema

YES I KNOW IM FREAKING DEPRIVED!!!

my bdae cake!

me n e cake!
me n my cake AGAIN

wahahaha...

so cool lar

e cake had a biscuit base

but its SUPER SWEET

almost lyk e tiramisu cake tt my cedar frens bought for me

SUPER SWEET

haiz

nt tt i hate eating cakes

but i rly dun lyk cakes tt r too sweet

HAHA

but well

i appreciate e cake

or rather

BOTH CAKES

lols...

march hols ending liao

'sobs

i still gt my pile of incomplete hmwk

shit man

shall go chiong my hmwk now

tata!

presents frm my kor!

2008-03-14T19:11:00.003+08:00

wah!!!
kor so nice lar
gave me my bdae present 2day =)
hahas
thnx kor!
i will definitely jiayou de!
GAMBATTE!!!
一百分的猴子！！！ original form...
MONKEY GIFT 1
MONKEY GIFT 2

damn funny lar!
both gifts gt smth 2 do wif monkey
but tts cos i gt 2 know my kor better thru 'bull fighting'
hahas
ARIGATOU KOR KOR!!!
wish u all e best for ur studies ! =p

1 more day to D DAY!!!

COUNTING DOWN 2 D DAY!!! =P

2008-03-13T22:40:00.001+08:00

2 more days!!!!!! =)

my bdae presents frm nu er, keet n pok!

2008-03-12T23:09:00.003+08:00

this is frm my nu er, candice darling. OMG. she tell me use this 2 go SEDUCE her future daddy. wth lar?! LOLS. dad says i gt nth 2 show anyway. which is a fact, frankly speaking. XD

necklace frm keet n pok. SO SWEET! =)

earrings tt came tgt wif e necklace. OMG lar. i feel so paiseh. muz hv been quite ex. THNX ALOT KEET N POK! =)

went out to eat dinner wif nu er candice, keet n pok

damn long nvr see them liao (i see keet almost everyday in sch, so NA)

we ate at ajisen

ordered crayfish
YUMMMY!!!!!!

haha...

then keet n pok brought e tiramisu cake

wif candles on it

i felt rly happy sia =)

HAO XIN FU !!!!

so fortunate 2 hv such gd frens arnd

hahas

miss cedar lots...

mooncake's bdae in abt 30 mins time!

HAPPY BDAE MOONCAKE!!!

wahahaha.... =p

d day's coming in 2 days 30 mins time..

WAHAHAHAHA!!!

counting down.... =)

NYAA CAMP MYSTERY!!!

2008-03-11T17:33:00.002+08:00

WOOTS!
nyaa camp finally over
hahas
spent 3D2N wif ODAC n yh, jess, ml, yr n reuben
being in e log comm was a gd experiance
learnt alot frm gina darl
abt how xin ku n tiring e job can be
without her
i think i wld hv screwed up e entire log stuff
THANX ALOT DARL!!
next up: AJYJ xchange prog
this time in admin comm
n hopefully can work wif sum J1s
plus expose myself to admin stuff
btw if u guyz wanna see photos i took during e camp
go 2 my frenster acct
yupz
but its nt rly alot though
hahas

muz go chiong hmwk liao
there's loads to complete b4 i can rly enjoy myself
D DAY'S CUMING!!!!! =)

i miss my EC...

......

2008-03-06T12:14:00.002+08:00

haiz
gg 2 see e p n ms siau later liao
tgt wif e 2 Js and kb

dunno y im in so much trouble this yr
well
the chi horoscope did say e horse yr's gonna hv a bad yr now
but i suppose u cant put tt as a reason
ITS ALL MY FAULT
if i hadnt played cards at all
all these wouldnt hv happened
my record will be 'clean n green'
juz lyk all along
hahas
wish time could turn back

anyway
im super busy rite now
wif nyaa camp cuming up
there's loads of log 2 prepare
n e's nt rly helping?!
hell
i can try being independent =)
dun nd his help
wahahaha
girls rawk!
hehehehe

so till then
tata!

P.S i got new EC!!! no guessing thnk u. =)

p ubin!!!

2008-02-25T21:48:00.002+08:00

woots!
went to recee for odac
cycled to e east for 1st half
fell at least 6 times sia
=(
in front of so many ppl!!!
stupid eug took photo of me after
i fell into a mud puddle
piang.
go ahead
laugh as much as u want
anyway
i wasnt an experianced cyclist
so its rather norm for me le.
LOL

then at e 2nd half
i had leg cramp
cos burger stop n help me
we lost e whole grp
OMTIAN LAR
i felt so ps n guilty
haiz
but burger was v nice
she say as long as we both get out of tt place can liao
hahas
we met a man later on
he was also lost
haha
so we went up e mountain biking trail
n back track all e way to e main road
woots
i n burger reached e bb court arnd 3
so ps for making every1 wait 4 us
n rly rly thnk u burger! =)

but anyway
after completing a 'bike marathon'
since we cycled more than enough
hopefully tt means i've becum a better cyclist
yupz =)

will be rather busy during this wk cos of selection camp stuff
hahas
till then
tata!

i still prefer jade over a rock. will there be aquamarine, my one true love?
i will never consider rock, even if it turns out to be a diamond.

update. soon.

2008-02-24T19:57:00.002+08:00

ps ppl..
will update soon
juz went to p ubin 2day.
will blog abt it more 2mrw
since my timetable is
f-ing ridiculously free.
hahas.
tata! =)

Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis

2008-02-18T21:21:00.002+08:00

Closed off from love
I didn't need the pain
Once or twice was enough
And it was all in vain
Time starts to pass
Before you know it, you're frozen

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking i'm going crazy

But I don't care what they said
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That i keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep,keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet i know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

But nothing's greater
Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me
Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe

And it's draining all of me
Oh they find it hard to believe
I'll be wearing these scars
For everyone to see

JUMPER!!!!

2008-02-17T20:15:00.002+08:00

such a fun day 2day!
went for chem tuition
(ok..tts nt e fun part duh...)
then met jy at e bus stop
waited 4 yh n my
kb was late
so we went 2 kfc
1st time eating a zinger!
wahahaha..
i sound so deprived man

after tt was JUMPER!!!
WOOTS!!!
so damn cool lar!
he can 'jump' frm places 2 places
wtshit
imagine during ur break can jump home
or jump 2 sum country
jump 2 ANYWHERE
piang.
I WANT TO BE A JUMPER!
or.. lyk in e show..
hv a jumper BF
wtf.
tt wld be so great sia.
rome lookd damn nice!!!
muz go there when i hv e $
hehehe..
yh said e actors damn lucky
get to travel arnd lar!
N THEY R FREAKIN PAID!
unfair.

will be rather free e nxt whole wk
cos mon practically no tutorial
tues hol
wed-fri ORIENTATION 2
piang.
sianz...
now we r lyk super super slack
of course
sumtimes oso gt 2 chiong hmwk lar
n nw we oso more stressed...
haiz
muz jiayou
mum oso complaining i nowadays quite slack
gg out too often
(hey.. i didnt go out last mnth lar!)
hahas
anyway
jump back
nw muz rly jiayou 4 nxt term. =)
tata!
*jumps to rome

cross ctry!

2008-02-15T23:06:00.002+08:00

woots!
i rly tried my best 2day liao
thnk god i didnt drop dead sia
lols
results nt out yet
hopefully can be in top 20
hahas!
o.. n 1408 won 2nd place
wahahah!
so hpy!!!
hehe..
2day laugh too much liao
v tired
will blog more nxt time =)

FRENSHIP/ V DAY

2008-02-14T19:19:00.002+08:00

WOOTS!
FRENSHIP/ V DAY!!!
hehehe...
spent a lot of time for 'preparing' v day
basically
juz gettin presents
hahas
went shoppin wif kb at ps on tues
then ytdy nite,
spent almost e whole nite wrappin up e presents
slept at arnd 12 plus
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

gave wr, zl, pl, kb, my, jy, jon (jy n jon is me n kb share de)
eug, yh, gina, kor kor, dx, ry, zy, keet, yr
rly sry 2 e rest of e ppl hu gave me bt i didnt give back
psps!
i'll get more nxt yr?
hahas

will try uploadin pics of e gifts tt i gave n received
(i love my wrapping!!!)
o yar
i received an anonymous pink rose frm sum1
e red one was frm candice
e other one 'a friend'
i was lyk wth?
hu on earth so wu liao one
mr/ms 'a friend'
can tell me hu u r if u hppnd 2 read this?
thnx a lot!

gtg mug 4 bio le
hahas
tata!

HAPPY FRENSHIP/ V DAY 2 ALL OF U!!! <3

random post

2008-02-11T15:42:00.000+08:00

‘生命中再也不会有机会看到真爱的存在
从今天起你的心不会跳
你的汗水不会有热情
你吃的饭不会有味道
一直到你死的那一天
你都会后悔 ’

WAHAHAA....I'M LOVING MYSELF!!!!

2008-01-29T19:35:00.000+08:00

HEY PPL!!!
I'VE GOT A NEW HAIRSTYLE!!!
omtian...
zi lian...
for e 1st time?!
i so LOVE my hair now.
guess i dun hv 2 put a pic of me here
since im gg sch 2mrw.
get ready 2 comment ppl!
hehehe...
*secretly hoping for gd comments
actually
i was kinda hoping for hebe's hairstyle in
dou niu yao bu yao
as in e short hair version
then 2day when mum brought me 2 e hairstylist
i told him e length of how short i wantd it 2 be
(not exactly short lar.. but u know wat i mean)
n he said he'll give me a new hairstyle
ok...
then after he was done
i was lyk OMTIAN
it was exactly wat i wantd!!!
ok lar
im nt hebe
of course i wun look as nice as her
but i rly rly lykd tt hairstyle
n so far mum thinks i look great in short hair
except for e time i lookd exploded in tt ez link card photo
damn tt $10 hairstylist n e cameraman.

so looking forward 2 2mrw! =)

LONG TIME NO BLOG

2008-01-20T22:40:00.000+08:00

NOTE: i finished studyin geog, tts y i can blog now. i didnt slack! =p

OMTIAN
im so sry!!!
psps
this blog is lyk so freakin dead
outdated.
wateva u call it.
e passion for bloggin lyk dying down liao.
hahas.
but hmm
at least i found a new one!
BASKETBALL!!!
how does tt sound?
let me know thru e tagboard =)
anyway, muz rly thank coach tai aka khui pisang 4 givin me lessons on bb.
ARIGATOU!

i know alot of ppl are concerned abt me
ever since e 'staying back' thing came abt.
so yar, ppl,
thnx 4 ur concern =)
rly appreciate all of yall.
love u ppl !!
how shld i put it..
i think my mind has sumwat overcomed this barrier
but of course
no one is perfect
i admit
there r times whereby i juz start stone-ing
n ask myself
'y m i in this feels-pathetic-but-not-rly state?'
sounds lyk i hvt rly gotten over e setback
in fact
this can be considered my greatest setback so far

its rly hard to keep hvin an optimistic view
rly difficult to keep up tt false pretense wif ppl hu think
'omg, u're a RETAINEE'
tts rite.
i'm one.
but tt doesnt mean im of a lower intellectual level than them.
i rly hope ppl can stop tt 'traditional' way of thinking.
cos tt rly breaks my self-confidence.
and not to mention
e other fellow peers in e same state as me.
in a nutshell,
be more sensitive.
its time tt ppl shld learn e true meaning of RESPECT.
nevertheless,
we'll also try our very best to gain this respect tt we deserve.
after all,
our A lvl's results may prove to be far better than our
fellow J2 peers.
even if it takes 1 more year.

k,
enough abt e lecture
will be hving loads of stuff gg on nxt wk
(approx in 1 hrs time)
ALOT of ODAC
2 tests (geog lithosphere n bio nt confirmed)
omtian lar.
i was plannin 2 put my heart n soul into scoring well for e 1st few tests
so as to hv a better impression
guess i nd 2 rly jiayou 4 this upcoming busy wk!
hahas.
bcos of my new passion for bb
i kept bugging mum 2 get me a basketball.
wahaha..
hope i'll be able to get 1 by end of nxt wk
so i can hv more trainings e wk after
when all my tests n e busy ODAC period is over!
woots!
cant wait!!
1 more shocking thing
i've been Absurdly
(tts absurdly wif a capital A)
elected as math rep.
omftian.
to be honest,
i wanted 2 be a class leader so i hv
at least sumthng more to write in my gc
but in my j1 class
there's a more suitable candidate
trust me, she's rly capable n competent.
so i decided 2 forget abt being one temporary.
hopefully after jae i can summon more courage
n nominate myself to be 1.
nominating myself has always been an extremely difficult task.
i juz dun hv e guts to.
hahas.
so im keeping my fingers crossed tt i can be more brave
in e time to come!

juz being random here.
I MISS 30/07!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i rly rly miss u guyz.
sobs.
'slaps myself back to reality

so then..
hope my long post helpd make up
4 e long time of anti-bloggin trend..
thnx 4 e encouragement again!
jiayou ppl!!! =)

MERRY X'MAS!!!

2007-12-25T16:14:00.000+08:00

yo there!
long time no blog liao.
lols
psps
ever since came back frm thailand damn lazy 2 blog
hahas.
but anyway
2 summarise thailand
one word:
FUN!
para-sailing, jet ski, banana boat rawkz!
shopping was great too!
all those imitation goods..
hehe

juz had 30/07 chalet as well
but abit sad cos im OFFICIALLY no longer in 30/07 anymore
still
i cant imagine myself feeling sad thruout e chalet
haha
so.. might as well enjoy myself 2 e max!
1 unforgettable thing 2 note is
our little misadventure
wif my, wr n ry
lols
freaky n exciting sia!
getting lost in e park at abt 3 plus am
coolest thing i ever got into!
hahas

anyway
would lyk 2 say
a merry xmas 2 all out there!
enjoy ur christmas!!! =)

斗牛要不要？ =）

2007-11-29T15:59:00.000+08:00

currently crazy over this new taiwan drama

斗牛要不要

omtian

this show rawkz sia!!!

lee wei n he jun xiang!!!

wah..

da shuai ge leh..

lols

this show is rly great.

MUST WATCH!!!

'你听过篮球拍动地板，

震撼人心的重低音吗？

那是全世界最悦耳的战鼓

引爆无限高昂的斗志

我要跟大家说的故事，

是关于斗牛跟爱情的。

因为篮球，

我认识了爱情的各种面貌，

也因为篮球，

我认识了沈若赫。

一直到认识他，

我才知道，

一颗篮球是怎样改变一场比赛，

是怎样主宰一个人的心跳，

怎样决定两个人的命运。

...............

对我来说，

原来爱情跟斗牛的精神是一样的。

不论你的防守有多严密，

只要我喜欢你，

就一定会找出你的破绽；

突破你；

抄截你；

穿越你；

然后得分。 '

---hebe

跟我来场真心相对的爱情赛事。

斗牛要不要？

http://img.ku6.com/common/V2.0.1.swf?vid=RlBDIxEJpt3EsxNH

ending song for 斗牛要不要

scene's super duper ROMANTIC!!!

OMTIAN.

damn jealous sia.

lols.

FINALLY.

2007-11-25T22:45:00.000+08:00

hey ppl,
rly
rly
sry!!!
i've been rly busy
cos of e marathon thingy
*i mentioned in previous post liao.
9am to 9pm
siao sia!
but overall it was a great working experiance
looking at ppl frm all walks of life
all kinds of attitudes n manners
yupz
kenna scolded on 1st day cos inexperianced
stupid me n tt stupid lady
im not gonna say oops cos i think she went abit overboard
she deserves a slap.
subsequently e ppl were ok
of course, there were v. nice ppl too! =)
i think this cip was e best cip i hv EVER done
SERIOUSLY.
im gonna join nxt yr, both e cip n e marathon sia
looks cool lar!
SUPPORT SCM2008!

backtrack abit...
came back frm mt k
didn't managed 2 conquer mt k
didnt managed 2 go white water rafting. =((
i was SO looking forward 2 it lar! wth.
k shall i start naming all my unfortunate 'injuries'?
day b4 we left, i fell at home
hurt my hip n nearly suffered head concussion
*cos i passed out.. siao lar..
1st day of expdtn..
fell in toilet of rose cabin (boy's dorm)
hurt backbone =( still hurts..
2nd day..
had muscle cramps nearly all e way
muz rly thank yi hang for helping me carry e bag n helping me along e way.
THANK U SO MUCH!!! =)
3rd day..
same thing.. sianz
n oso, i sprained my left foot while descending. =(
4th day..
had food poisoning
vomited twice in e morning
sick sia..
then went to e doc at kinabalu city
returned 2 trekker's lodge
had a fever (38.8)
siao again.
5th day (last day)
ok liao,
juz tt dunno y still giddy
n stomach was pain after taking wat e doc prescribed
(i dun rly trust e doc sia)

yupz..
as u can see
i had e TIME OF MY LIFE
lols.
not being sarcarstic here.
hehe.
v sry 2 worry every1
esp mr chin
im now ok liao.
so thnx a lot!
but anyway, despite all those,
expdtn was fun.
juz wished i could hv seen e sunrise leh.=(
haha.
will do next time!

gtg for now.
will continue 2mrw bah! tata! =p

weeee.....

2007-11-14T17:13:00.000+08:00

ps for e long long wait.
super busy
slacking.
lols.
not exactly lar.
am preparing for mt k expdtn.
woots!
6000 plus metres!
damn cool sia.
or rather damn COLD.
cos i heard e temp can go to abt 0.
totally cool.
i'll be bringing my cam along
so check out e photos when im back.

but then again
e photos will hv to wait for abt 3 days
cos after i reach s'pore at 2 am
i'll spend e 'morning' in sch zzz
then go home slack
then go for CIP e next day
9am - 9pm
lyk omtian lar
im gonna drop dead after everything is over
but at least CIP will be rather interesting
standard charted marathon helpdesk/info counter staff
hehe
i think this will be e coolest CIP i ever done so far
lols.
anyway, gg off for mt k starting on thur
(we'll be spending e nite in sch)
wish me luck! =p

hell's over!!!

2007-11-02T20:33:00.000+08:00

WOOTS!!!
PW IS FINALLY OVER!!!
omtian
u dun know how happy i am sia.
no more guan xi wif u-know-hu liao.
damn happy.
but haiz.
im so gonna miss
khui pisang n mooncake
(we rawk!!!)
jy e faggot (maybe? lols. jkjk)
n e sundays we SACRIFICED
for e sake of?
getting an A in pw.
as simple as that.
but nevertheless,
e whole process was as complex as it could get.
wonder how much white hair we hv gained.
lols.

super super damn tired.
had odac endurance training 2day.
i went over my limit liao.
or rather, my own expectations bah.
haha.
super satisfied wif my own performance. =)
wantd 2 use my blog to scold u-know-hu initially.
but now,
im rly rly exhausted.
no strength left liao.
haiz.
2mrw's briefin for sc marathon cip!
dun 4get!!! =)
zzz.............

woots! 1 more year for me!!!

2007-10-27T23:26:00.000+08:00

nope.
i dun mean tt im gg to j2.
most of those ppl hu was concerned abt me
during tt period of time already know my
'status', as wat i deemed it to be.
yupz.
its official.
im RETAINED.
BUT
BUT
BUT,
RETAINING =/= GIVING UP
get this right.
getting retained does not mean tt
i have lost hope in myself.
TT WILL NEVER BE POSSIBLE.
i strongly assure you this. =)

but anyway,
after crying for 3 times on thurs,
1 (after vp meeting),
2 (outside g office),
3 (outside op rehersal classroom)
and of course a lot of reflection on my part
im finally back on track.
i've straightened out my thoughts
after drying tt wat-seemed-to-go-on-4ever tears.

no more hidden emotions.
no more unsaid pain.
no more 'brave front'.
it will now be just me and myself alone.
wateva tt i say on this blog will just merely reflect my thoughts
* without filtering =)

1) I AM SERIOUSLY OK.
cos alot of my close frens kept asking me
'are u really ok?'
if u asked me tt on thurs,
i would hv juz cried in front of u.
no doubt abt tt.
so on thurs if u talkd 2 me on msn n asked tt
famous qn of e day,
i juz typed 'yar im ok' and put =)
whereas at home in front of e com,
i was crying lyk siao. alone.
k, tt sounds damn pathetic.
but tt was THURSDAY.
now, im over it liao.
face reality. =)

2) actually,
retaining is better in e long run.
tt was wat i learnt on tt same day.
hvin 1 more chance.
to score distinction in a lvls.
instead of hving 1 more chance to promote
and get C and D for A's.
which of course,
is rather stupid and absurb of me.
why would i want to sacrifice my a lvl juz to promote?
yes, i still think its abit shameful.
but for e sake of gettin a place in NUS,
i MUST get distinctions NO MATTER WAT
obstacles i face.
tts e harsh reality i must face.
and of course,
face it in an optimistic way!
so fellow retainees
dun be sad
cos tt shows we hv one more chance to PROVE our
TRUE CAPABILITIES during A's. =)

3) im so gonna miss 30/07!!!
tts one thing im definitely gonna cry abt.
its really damn sad im not in e same class as u guyz.
i enjoyed every single moment wif u ppl.
frm strangers in april.
to tt busy may.
getting to know e juiciest scandals.
organising chalet in june.
being involved in a huge 'conflict' in july.
talkin 2 u ppl frm cambridge in aug.
chiongin tgt in sept.
facing e music in oct.
all these months.
i did not really cherish e times spent.
u can say tt i took for granted.
which makes me even more reluctant.
but i'll still stay =) and frenz 4ever!
* wouldnt it be weird to think of me as a junior? lols.

so basically.
i sincerely thank and love those ppl hu supported me
throughout e gd times and bad times.
these memories will always be wif me.
4ever.
thank you for creating these unforgettable memories. =)
cheers to a new start, a new destination!

=) fake or real?

2007-10-16T19:10:00.000+08:00

i dunno liao.
getting such shitty results.
trying to put up a brave front all day long.
certainly tired me out.
that fake smile.
those real tears of genuine sadness and disappointment.
it seemed for a moment that no-one understood me.
absolutely no-one.

yes.
but im still aware of my frens around me.
thnx lots for ur encouragement.
but i think the only thing tt can really keep me gg on is
to get promoted successfully.
which desperately needs a miracle right now.

miracles have happened to me many times in my life.
the most recent one being me passing my grade 6 piano exam
taking into account the fact tt i went to cambridge for 2 wks.
i see that as a miracle.
another miracle was my 8 pts.
though i did dreamt of it,
i thot that was just an illusion that i wanted to see badly on my cert.
but no,
it became reality.

so there,
if my life has been full of miracles so far,
god,
please,
let me believe another miracle can happen,
and that i can be promoted successfully.
i dun wanna waste one year of my life lyk this.
i dun wanna regret for e whole year.
i dun wanna become a j1 again.
no way.
please spare me from tt never-ending cycle.
i promise,
that if im given another chance,
i will forgo anime for a month
(dun laugh! anime now is impt to me!)
but tt is if im given another chance.
just one more chance.
to prove myself.

MOVIE!!!

2007-10-10T20:20:00.000+08:00

YEAH!!!
went to watch resident evil: extinction
haha.
im so 'brave'.
dotz.
actually its more lyk e opp?!?!
lols.

had fun wif every1
wr, pl, khui pisang, mooncake, yh, reuben, eugene n last but not least
e model couple!!! (bdae boy n u-know-hu)
lols.
jkjk.

we all conspired 2 make the 'couple' sit tgt
lols!
reuben's 'drawing lots' seem to show tt e couple was fated 2 be tgt!!
hehe...
sat wif yh, mooncake and khui pisang.
e 2 siao ppl beside me (ie mooncake n khui) hugging each other n saying
'dawn! its cuming!!!'
WTH LAR!
i was already damn scared liao.
nothing to hold onto except for tt laptop of mine.
bleah.
nxt time muz bring a jacket or a bag so i can hug it.
lesson learnt!

if tt movie was considered as a thriller
i may not be able to survive horror movies liao.
lols.
no kidding.
i felt my heart stopped countless of times throughout e whole show.
=(
every1 laughed at me.
esp mooncake n khui.
- -'''
im super super not brave sia.
haiz.

but overall,
i enjoyed e whole outing!
2mrw's gonna be whole more FUN!!!
building sandcastles at east coast.
woots! =)
lastly, i would lyk to wish jy happy bdae!
hope u had fun!!! =)

its summer time!

2007-10-04T19:48:00.000+08:00

k.
who m i kidding sia.
singapore's always summer.
lols.
seems lyk i lost my sense of humour le.
haiz.
but anyway
exams are FINALLY over.

but of course.
hell's coming soon for me.
haiz.
hope i dun 死到 so 惨.

today's supposed to be a day of happiness for me.
but why did i not really enjoy it lyk i do over these past few years?
something's weird.
very weird.
is it a premonition that something bad's going to happen?
i dun wanna wake up to reality anymore.
pls juz let me sleep and dream my whole life away.

sad. let the tears flow.

2007-09-12T18:09:00.000+08:00

sad.
super sad.
wat muz i do 2 see you again?
i miss the old jabba.
i miss the calling of princess fiona.
i miss being tt slime ogress.
you are not who you are now.
no way.
please.
stop putting me in such a situation.
im breaking down le.
seeing the tears roll down.
is it worth it?
wat use is it?
u can't see the pain im gg thru now.
i juz want to go back to the first 4 months.
that period of time.
that period of perfect friendship.
please.

i know i have to earn back that trust i lost.
but u have to give me a chance.
how can i prove myself?

stressed.
bad headache.
banning myself from e com 2mrw onwards.
anything juz sms me bah.
if not.
mugging period's here.
omtian.
god help me.
i need 2 juz chiong for 2 wks.
then im off to hols! =)
CONCENTRATION.
jiayou bah ppl!
n of course, myself too.
jiayou, dawni3.
jiayou, princess fiona.

no more com for me!

2007-08-30T21:36:00.000+08:00

time to get my priorties right
no more com for me
at least until my piano exam is over
so ppl hu wanna talk 2 me
sms me or
juz talk 2 me in sch!
but i'll be online for PW though.
haha.
cheers. =)

RC OUTING!!!! <3

2007-08-27T21:59:00.000+08:00

hey ppl!
woohoo!
our outing was cool sia..
went to eat pepper lunch (omtian, again!)
another $10 gone.
then we walked arnd
n we met up wif shitien, melvin n yanru
they went for lunch
while...
we went for ICE-CREAM!
ahhhh....
im gg 2 gain weight soon le.. =(

then cum e best part.
we were debating whether to watch 'dead silence'
or 'hairspray'
bryan n ts were trying to persuade us to watch dead silence wif them
piang
i so easily freaked out
even in day time
dead silence as a horror movie is a definite no-no sia.
they say im frm odac
so i shld be more brave
pls lar!
odac is one thing.
being strong spiritually is another thing!
esp now 7th month..
brr...
dun wanna take e risk sia.
IM NOT CHICKEN!!!

but anyways,
glad tt i chose hairspray
HAIRSPRAY SO RAWKZ SIA!!!!!
5stars!!!!!!
ZAC EFRON IS SO SHUAI!!!!!
my new idol. =)
e show was really nice
it was rather light-heartening
made all of us laugh lyk siao
clarence say i noisy
but hey,
e show's funny!
dun i hv e right to laugh at my own will?
kk
nvm
back to e topic.

when our grp all came out frm e show,
we were all laughing n saying wow.
this show so rawkz.
n get this right.
when e 'dead silence' ppl came out,
they were DEAD SILENT!!
OMTIAN
lmao!!!
all freaked out
esp bryan
hu was also e same person hu said to me
'PG only wat'
'only have some disturbing scenes'
lols
n he said he was freaked out by e show!
see the irony?!
thnk god i didnt watch dead silence sia.

but anyway ppl,
if u wanna catch a movie,
go see
HAIRSPRAY*****
its really funny.
really.
n girls, zac efron looks really shuai!
kk
official le.
my 2 idols now are SHAWN n ZAC EFRON!
haha..=D

back to e mugging state. =(
so lookin forward to after promos.
i wanna go for another outing!!!
shama lar! =p
till then..
haiz.. =(

crappin' again..

2007-08-26T22:57:00.000+08:00

hurray!
im gg out 2mrw!
our very 1st reach cambridge outing!!!
lols
quite sad though cos not every1 can make it =(
boohoo..

IM SO HAPPY TT SHAWN WON!!!!!!!!!!
lols..
i went quite siao esp when they announced shawn is the winner.
haha..
how feng can i be sia..
gg gaga over a boy 4yrs my junior..
but hey!
HE'S DAMN CUTE! =p

also congrats to keely!
*if not sum1 say i bias sia.. o.O
she's damn pro man...
went thru e whole journey..
its not easy at all..
n of course,
she's extremely CHIO!
nope, im not jealous!
cum on, i'll never be jealous cos of sum1's looks!
only immature ppl will think tt way.
hahas!
im zi-kua ing myself again
talkin crap.

cleared sum hmwk tt was rather urgent.
went berserk over EOM draft 3
omtian.
wanted to tear e paper le..
but..
'dun get angry, get wise!'
as quoted frm a bai-chi!
lols
hope he doesnt read this! =p
so tt leaves studying for bio spa n completing math
plus revision
omtian
no way i can take piano exam le
though its lyk in 9 days n counting!!
i think im juz gonna hv 2 give up.
really sorry, gina.
but i can't.
im admitting defeat le.

so looking forward to 2mrw!
hope we guyz hv fun!
then its back to the MUGGING state.

can't wait for november..
wanna get this done and over with..
get promoted can le.. =)
is tt too much to ask of me?!

ahhhhhh!!!!!!!

2007-08-22T20:45:00.000+08:00

omtian!!! keely's quite chio!!! SHAWN IS DAMN CUTE!!!!!!!!!! ha.. next time my bro muz either be as cute or cuter than him.. haha! e 2 shawns!! =p here's some pics of campus superstar ppl!! =)

more photos!

2007-08-18T21:55:00.000+08:00

more photos!

2007-08-18T21:46:00.000+08:00

scenery photos!

2007-08-16T20:51:00.000+08:00

photos!

2007-08-16T20:22:00.000+08:00

shitien, me n sabrina!

me n sarah! =p

small grp photo at genzyme!!!

PUNTING!!!! OMTIAN... SO LOVE PUNTING...

grp photo at botanical gardens!!! love e scenery there!!!

IM BAAAACCCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-08-14T22:01:00.000+08:00

omtian
im back le
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
I WANNA STAY AT CAMBRIDGE!!!!!!
life there was lyk heaven
after lessons (which was interesting n very slack) was juz
FUN
FUN
and
FUN
all that SHOPPING!!
enjoyed myself thoroughly there
hahas
i miss cam le!!!
='(

bought loads of stuff..
dad n mum didn't scold me for spending too much
though they laughed when they saw
e 8 packets of instant pasta i brought back frm cam
=p
they said i was siao
lol
i think i didnt buy enuf souvieners though
piang

but at cam i gain lots of extra knowledge
lots of new frens *shama!
n of course
a NEW dawn
yupz
jy dun faint if u see tt i changed hor
hmm..
but overall
e new me's much better
n hopefully
now i hv matured
into a more sensible person
yupz

so see u guyz in sch!
hopefully can hv a cambridge gang outing after promos
haha
SHAMA!!!

i so miss cambridge...

o my.. its sat already!!!

2007-08-12T00:29:00.000+08:00

dear me
its sat liao
die lar
hvnt studied for bio test
piang
I DUN WANNA FAIL!!!
no way
shall chiong on e plane

o i bought LOADS of stuff man
u wun believe it
all e things tt i bought
damn scared not enuf space in my luggage
my food has already taken up 3/4 of my luggage capacity
time for odac action!
tryin desperately to flatten my clothes
n rolled some of them up too
haha
odac really taught me lots of stuff i nvr knew

im finally known as a shopping queen
i spent abt hmmm
300£ liao?!
yupz
if im not wrong
or maybe more
piang
dad n mum's gonna kill me
bought alot of tops n a dress n a HAT!!
omtian..
SO LOVE TT HAT
of course i oso bought souvenirs for my family
tea leaves n coffee
slurp!
bought chocs too!!!
lucky for ts
otherwise i would hv oversplurged again

1 more interesting thing
i went PUNTING!!!!
lyk finally
i've always wanted to go punting since day 1
SO FUN!!!
i hv a video of me trying to row e boat
COOL sia
n when i was on e boat,
i immediately thot of kayaking
piang
i really miss kayaking

last thing
jy u might want to know
i finally encountered sum1 hu kept my temper in control for a full whole day
wonder how he did it
but anyway
it's still a miracle
WHOPEE!
im not trying to be demure
but juz be an ordinary girl
no worries
except tt when i get back
i need 2 settle sum matters wif a matured mindset
hope things turn out well n smooth!
o n don't look shock if u see photos of me in a dress..
cos i'm wearing for formal wear 2mrw!
gtg eat dinner b4 playing tennis wif ts le..
c u guyz soon!!!

enjoying my last few days in cambridge..=(

finally a NEW post!!

2007-08-07T14:19:00.000+08:00

yo ppl
miss u guyz lotz!
im counting down e days of
1) seeing u ppl again!!!
2) dooms day *omtian all e hmwk n tests?!
3) leaving cambridge =(

piang
damn sad lar
SO MUCH HMWK
really scared can't catch up

anyway,
2day, im doin on breast cancer genetics
hurray!
finally sumthing tt im interested in
since its part of my future research field
unlike ytdy's lec which was a lot on PHYSICS
omtian
i wanted 2 shout
hullo.. im a bio student
not PHYSICS
wateva quantum theory doesnt apply to me
its ALIEN to me!
hahas
nearly fell asleep on lec again
seems lyk i always hv tt habit
lol

e trip to london was lyk total waste of money
RJ paid for e same amt n they had a double deck open view bus
they went to e london eye n big bang n went shoppin
N THEY BOUGHT SHOES FOR 5 PUNDS EACH!!!
OMTIAN
pathetic me
im so gonna go on a shopping spree this sat (our free day!)
bought gifts for mum,shawn,grandparents,wr,zl,pl so far
haha
will still buy on sat for e rest of e class n odac ppl!
gosh
i think i really missed out a lot on odac
=(

i took loads of pics but
i will be needing ch's com which is lyk being passed arnd by e girls
lol
btw i seen ch's gf
hmm
i find her ok
looks still ok
not yet to chio bu standard
shen cai damn good sia
haha
go imagine

o 1 last thing
their instant noodle rawkz sia
esp ham n cheese flavour!!!
damn nice.
i shall buy back at least 8 bowls
o n i bought microwaveable spaghetti n dunno-wat-meat-is-tt which comes with mash potato
yum
we'll be lookin out on Aug 12 for meteor shower n hvin an outdoor picnic (we bought PIZZA!)

things r gg quite well
except for sumthing which er i cant confirm
hmm
hopefully things will turn out alright!
gtg le!
tada! =)

*missing u guyz lotz...

1st part emo-ing, then back 2 reality

2007-08-05T05:40:00.000+08:00

heys..
hvnt been updating my blog lately
hahas
was quite BUSY for e past 2 (or 3?) days

omtian
i've suddenly became SO ACTIVE here
played frisbee, tennis and 'pepsi cola' during the evenings
in other words
i've been SLACKING
had lessons yesterday on proteomics
omtian
it was ALIEN
except for e intro part (amino acids stuff)
piang
i hvnt been startin on e proj tt we r supposed 2 complete by e 2nd last day
which is lyk 8 days away?!
dear me..

despite the active schedule here
i also had a quiet moment by the pond to sit down n reflect
yeah
so-called reflect
it became emo-ing
i thot back 2 e past events tt happened before i left
really
really
i felt ALONE
all of a sudden
i couldnt control my emotions
wanted 2 just cry
but i couldnt
cos ch n gang were nearby
dun want them 2 think i was weak little dawn
ha
sounds retard

lookin at wr's blog made me even worse
sorry
but it did
thinking of myself being potrayed as sum1, sumthing else
was really unbearable
IM NOT WHAT U THINK I AM
y do ppl see as if i started it?
it was juz a misunderstanding
there were sum qns tt also made me a victim
made me wanna cry
but no
no-one was there for me
great
i've been looked upon as a BAD GURL
no more innocent dawn
its e devil who's here to take over
i think it would be rather unfair if i juz blurt out tt sumthing tt happened
in addition to wat u ppl know
so i think i'll juz try to 4get abt it
though i really felt tt i was insulted
seriously insulted

ok
no more emo-ing le
back to reality
im now in cambridge
which gives me (n tt 2 ppl n every1 else) plenty of time 2 4get abt it
pls
dun ever give me a look tt's pitiful
u dun know wat im gg thru right now
im determined 2 4get everything
so help me erase tt awful past tt happened
im not as bad as u think i am

but at least getting myself busy wun let me think abt him
i can temporary 4get abt him
slowly
i believe i can 4get everything
i will be able to let him go
face it, girl
u can never hold onto him
so juz let go.

ok emo finish le
gtg
back to e cheerful dawn! =)
miss u guyz loads!!!

my room in CAM!!!

2007-08-04T02:13:00.000+08:00

2007-08-02T06:45:00.000+08:00

ok first the pics!!!

today was a great day

we had a morning lecture

which was basically not of interest for me

cos it was on astrology

abt dust particles.

boo.

was really bored to tears.

then we were introduced 2 our tutor.

ok this part's interesting!

its...

ANOTHER DAWN!!!

lols

how interestin

hahas..

she was really nice

we had choc muffins n water DURING lesson

no offence but

CAN WE BE LIKE THEM??

hvin food n drinks is really really cool
moe shld try to implement sia
lols

ok.. up next

our trip 2 cambridge town again!!!

we visited the king's chapel

muz agree tt its really huge n grand

n we walked arn e town (supposedly small)

for abt 3hrs!!!

wow

my legs were aching

lols

then when we got back

we were pretty bored

so after dinner

we went for a walk

damn shiok

cos it aids digestion

we got to enjoy nature

so we walked arn e campus

a nature walk really

haha

then we played frisbee

damn fun sia

nvr really had this kind of fun for damn long

lols

ch was displaying 'counciller' qualities

tryin 2 be enthu n all

geng yuan was hurt

BY MISS WILLIAMS!!!

lol

but dun worry

he was not disfigured

lols

after tt, guess where we went?

THE BAR!!!

haha..

no alcohol though

but e spirited water was damn bitter

bleh..

made lots of new frens today =)

hahas

really happy

im chillin!! =p

more updates 2mrw!

miss u guyz lotz..

*omtian.. at this rate i no need study le.. lols.. n im feeding cows 2mrw.. =p

cambridge 1st day!!!

2007-07-31T22:42:00.000+08:00

ok ppl.. here's e long awaited update on me at CAMBRIDGE!!!
hahas..
1stly, weather here's abit chilly..
yupz..
11 dgs..
cooler than normal aircon.. =)

environment
V ARTISTIC
all e buildings here are SO OLD!!!
naturally the building structure is really artistic..
really cool.
will try upload photos taken asap (by 2nite? now's morning!)

living conditions
bedroom V SMALL!!!
but cosy
haha.. n im sleepin alone!
im SO BRAVE =)

miss u guyz lotz!
wun name them if not later all cum looking for me..
but yes zhilin.. u r one of them.
ha u muz be laughing lyk siao now.
wish u ppl were here..
wenrou peilin gina mingyue khuibin jabba(i muz be mad) eugene (same here) yi herng lirong all odacians n everyone hu i noe!

hope to see u guyz soon! tt will be 2wks later.. piang.. i will go mad..hahas..
do chk for updates kk?
signin off,
dAwNi3 =)

*btw e food's great.. n ex too! love e salad=)

light after dark, dawn after dusk =)

2007-07-30T19:09:00.000+08:00

everything's settled
finally
i feel much lighter now

to you-know-who:
i think u shld know le..
anyway
i decided 2 give up
though its hard n takes time
i will accomplish de
staying as frens is gd enuf le=)

im really fine now
really.

giving up.

2007-07-29T23:57:00.000+08:00

i dun deserve him anymore.

shall stay as frenz. =)

finally letting go.

no more lies.

im really sorry

2007-07-29T23:30:00.000+08:00

Sorry seems to be the hardest word to say
but i think i owe him one

i admit i did tell her alot lyk e dessert/milo thing
but i didnt tell her abt tt thing which u told me alone n no-one else.
i SWEAR.
serious.
cos in e first place,
I DUN DARE TO SAY.
lyk hullo..
im e ONLY person hu know lei
no one has ever entrusted such a thing to me lar.
so there's e responsibility.

im not as irresponsible lyk sum ppl (u-know-hu)
i see the dire consequences if i do leak out.
i do hv logical reasoning k.

but pls dun b mad at me k?
its ok if u dun ever tell me anything.
juz hope u dun be angry wif me can le.
or perhapes tts too much for me to ask of u?

but nevertheless
thanx for trusting in me at least once
really.
i appreciate it alot.

im not giving any excuse here.
so juz wanna admit
I'M REALLY SORRY
pls dun b mad le. =)

*if slappin me reduces ur anger, go ahead.
i think i deserve it.

and the tears keep falling.